


To See

by Hazelnut_Nala



Category: Shingeki no Kyojin | Attack on Titan
Genre: Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Alternate Universe - Soulmates, Eren Yeager Has Heterochromia Iridum, M/M, Non-Binary Hange Zoë, Rating May Change, Soulmates, more character to be added
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-09-19
Updated: 2016-06-05
Packaged: 2018-02-17 23:50:47
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 31
Words: 33,101
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2327642
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Hazelnut_Nala/pseuds/Hazelnut_Nala
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>In a world where you could only see in black and white, the first touch of your soulmate will bring color and love to your life.<br/>In this world lives Eren Jeager who hasn't found his soulmate yet. But everyone find their mate eventually. <br/>Right?</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Black

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> From the [tumblr AU prompt](http://levis-diddly-dong.tumblr.com/post/110927225058/dippy-the-space-squid-none-gavin-an-au-where) where you see all in black and white until you touch your soulmate  
> Second fanfic ever! Yay! Also I'm sorry for all the mistake that may occur, English is not my first language.  
> Sooo, I did this between two classes and I don't know what it's worth.  
> Beta credit for this chapter goes to tsukiomnom! Thank you!  
> Hope you enjoy!

Fifty shades of grey.  
No, this is not about that shitty book. This is about how I see the world.  
Several nuances of black.  
Multitudes of white.

Black, grey and white is my daily life. What I see and how I feel.  
No fancy colors, no clear sky blue, no deep forest green, no sunny yellow, no velvet red, no warm orange, no icy silver.

Only black, grey and white.

But I am not the only one to see like this; most people see the world just as I do. Basically, we were all born with achromatopsia.

But sometimes, you could be granted the bliss to see these vibrant colors.  
By finding your soulmate.

However, just “finding” your soulmate could not cure the achromatopsia. You have to touch them. By doing this, our heart rate will speed up while a chemical action takes place and the mutated cell in our eyes that allow us to see different colors will be slowly cured.

At first, you will only see color when you’re in contact with your soul mate, then, little by little your eyes will accommodate to allow you to see colors all the time, with or without them.

People that have already found their soulmate describe the first touch differently. For some it’s like fire is poured into your body, for others you’re drowning in cold water, or it’s like a warm comforting blow envelops you.  
But for all, they experience the same things when it comes to their eyes.  
First total blackness, then a bright light that will make you feel like you’re going blind.  
And after, it is total bliss.

  
Imagine; an explosion of color, of the world around you, of all the things you thought you would never see.  
But more importantly, you see your mate for the first time in color. See all the little details, the variation in their hair, their skin, lips, their eyes and all the color their iris’ hold inside. Sinking into those colorful and mesmerizing depths is by far the best feeling you’ll never experience… Or so they say.

I, Eren Jaeger, still haven’t found my soulmate.  
So for now I live this bland life of black and white.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Yeah I spend some time on the achromatopsia page on wikipedia... If you want more info you can go check the page.  
> (I know that the fifty shades of grey things wasn't necessary but... I couldn't resist)
> 
> Kudo and comment are always appreciated!


	2. White

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi!  
> Beta credit to tsukiomnom!  
> I'll try to update this once a week. (I'll try)  
> Please enjoy! :)

“Don't forget to hand over your work on Photoreceptor cells for next week or you'll fail this class,” Professor Shadis said grouchily, giving a warning look especially toward me. Seriously, I always wondered if he ever slept with those bags under his eyes.  
Maybe I wasn't what you would call an 'excellent' student but I could do my work if I wanted to. Particularly, if you took Netflix and tumblr away from me... and food... and the TV.  
I swear I could work if I concentrated enough. No need to say I have the attention span of a goldfish.

It was the end of my class on the visual system; I was in my second year of college and was studying neurophysiology of the eyes.  
When you are born with achromatopsia, understanding the eyes that don't allow you to see correctly is important. You can't live in this world and not understand why you can't see all these colors that the love-struck always describes as wonderful.

  
That’s what I think, at least. I've always been fascinated with our eyes. My dad had been too. He was a famous ophthalmologist and sometimes would explain some of his research to me. I've always admired him. That is, until he disappeared.

I made my way out of class and went to the cafeteria where I knew my friends were waiting for me. I saw a light gray, nearly white bowl cut and a black mass of hair; Armin and Mikasa.  
My mom once told me that Armin had blond hair, like the sun in the morning in winter, pale but warm, and blue eyes that shine like the sky in summer, whereas Mikasa had dark raven hair like the bird and brown almost black eyes.

  
But even with the most beautiful description, I couldn't imagine what these colors looked like. For me they had more or less dark and white hair and white and dark eyes.

“Eren, don't sleep in class,” Mikasa just glanced in my direction before turning her gaze back to her food.

“Don't know what you’re talking about, I didn't sleep. Hi, by the way, nice seeing you too.” Yeah, I loved sarcasm. I was sure I was born for the sole purpose of wising off to people. If the time comes where someone that’s more of a sarcastic asshole than me crosses my path I will bow, kiss their feet and worship them like a god. Right. Like that could happen.

“Even in black and white we can see the mark left on your cheek from the book you slept on, Eren,” Armin looked up at me from the book he was reading.  
Oh ho, that would explain the hard look Shadis gave me earlier.

“Well... when do you eat Armin? I always see you reading or studying. And when you're not doing this you stalk your favorite scientist.” I enjoyed teasing Armin as much as mouthing off. It was always fun to see his face darkening after one of my comments.  
I sat down next to him, Mikasa sat across him.

“I don't stalk them,” he said a little offended, “I just enjoy seeing their recent work. You should read them too, their work really is interesting!” He had the look in his eyes when he talked about something he was passionate about again. When Armin found something intriguing he would always study them until he mastered the subject. That was one of the things that I like about him, he was really passionate.

“Yeah, but don't forget to eat too Armin, we don't want to bring you to the hospital because you forgot to eat,” Mikasa said, her gaze still focused on her food.

“Again,” I added. Armin gave me his most stern look, which wasn’t really that stern, as you could probably imagine.

“Geez! That was one time! You would forget to eat too if Doctor Zoë made public their research on the retina!”

“I don't think so Armin, Eren would be the opposite, he would forget to work and only eat.”

“You would forget to work too if you found out Bacon was good with honey!” I mimicked Armin’s voice and he glared at me, and then decided his book was more entertaining than me. We continued to do small talk after a few minutes as we ate and went back to class.

  
Armin was in medicine. He was fascinated by the eyes like me but decided to be an ophthalmologist like my father while I decided that making consultation with people didn't interest me and I preferred doing research.

  
Mikasa was in sports, she was doing “Savate” (do not say French Boxing it's not the “appropriate” word), Aïkido and Karate. These were her favorite sports, but she also did some badminton and handball. She had some muscle. Alright, she had a lot of muscle. More than me I should say. I often called her Shane Wolfe, from the movie “The Pacifier” because she was like a mother to me and could kick some serious ass.

  
These two were my best friends and only family I had after the death of my mother and missing father.

After class I went back to my apartment, which was not far away from the campus incidentally.  
I studied a little (Yes I could do that believe it or not), ate and went to sleep.

  
My life was pretty normal and I liked it that way, you could think that in this world, I would waste my time chasing after my soul mate. But, everyone knows for a fact that you could die without ever finding them.  
So, instead of wasting time, I live in this bland world were color was a gift granted to the select few.

I didn't even wake up when the phone rang twice in a row, with a voice asking if Grisha Jaeger lived there.

  
I was too busy dreaming of things that I couldn't see.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks for reading!  
> Any comment on this work is welcomed!


	3. Grey

“Eren you will never guess what happened last night!” Was the first thing Armin told me excitedly in the morning. The air was a little foggy; it was too early in the morning for the sun to have risen high enough and dissipated the low hanging clouds, leaving the world in a somber hue. It wasn't completely dark; there were a few spots of white light showing though.

“No, but I bet I will know soon.” My lack of enthusiasm was evident in my voice. I hadn't slept well and my eyes kept hurting. My eyes always hurt when I didn't sleep well; this had happened since I was little and we never knew what caused it. My father didn't think it was necessary to treat me even thought I kept telling him about it.

“Come on Eren! This is like the biggest news of the century! It's Doctor Zoë!”

“What did they do this time? Find out birds could see color? A new species that can see color that even human eyes can’t?”

“No, no! And they already found out that some snakes could see infrared, by the way. No, they published a small post saying that they found research on the eyes that could explain how all this soul-mate thing worked and a cure that would allow our eyes to see color without The Revelation. They didn't tell too many details, they just said that they needed to find the scientist who did the research. Can you believe it! It could mean that soon everybody could see! We could be able to see color without our soul-mate!”

  
Indeed it was big news. “The Revelation” was the term used to describe the first touch of your soul-mate and gaining the ability to see. Many scientists claimed that they could cure our eyes but failed and the result was a great number of people going blind because of the “cure”.

  
Doctor Zoë was a famous and talented scientist that discovered a lot of things on the eyes. They worked at Recon Corporation, which was a well-known research facility. Recon corps was only founded five years ago but already explained most of the mechanisms of the soul-mate process.  
This gained my interest.

“And have they said who this genius scientist is?”

“No, unfortunately they haven’t. I would give anything to work with them! Just imagine discovering the greatest mystery of our world!”

“The greatest mystery of our world is how you could have the same hair cut for twenty years Armin.” Ha there it is, the famous 'you're shitting me' Armin look, I liked that look. It was the one he gave me when he was completely done with my shit.

“Just kidding Arm', yeah it would be great to work for them. But you know I’m pretty sure you have a chance to work there once you finish college.

“Do you know how many years of work it is to become a good ophthalmologist? Ten years Eren, I would die before it could happen!”

“Come on Armin! If someone could survive these ten horrible years it would be you! Anyway, where's Shane? She's gonna be late for her classes.”

“She went ahead, she had morning practice. Well, I'll see you at lunch, I'm going to be late too if I don't hurry.” With that he left to classes. It was time I did the same too if I didn't want to be late.

I made my way to my neurology class thinking about what Armin told me.  
Yes, it would be great if we could help them. Maybe I could help find this scientist; it would be up my alley. It's not as if the guy could have disappeared from the face of earth entirely.

Then maybe if I find him Recon corps would offer me a post as an intern or something like that. Doctor Zoë was one thing, but there were a lot of other talented scientists in the firm. There were doctors specialized in the eyes like Zoë, others in how our soul-mate was decided, and on what standard they were picked, some on the way our eyes saw black and white and how it could influence our mood.

  
Working with them would be an incredible experience.

After lunch with Armin and Mikasa, I went home. I didn't have class the afternoon and decided that I wanted to work a little.

  
Once I got home I noticed that I had three missed call that I didn't see that morning. It was from a private number, the three of them. Two last night and one today during class. Probably a salesperson or something.

  
I moved on to sorting out my mail and noticed a letter addressed to my father. Without checking the recipient I put it in the bin. My father was long gone and whatever was in this letter didn't have anything to do with me.

  
I was about to begin to study when the phone started ringing. Sighing, I went to answer. I knew that my motivation was flying away the moment I picked the phone up.

“Shut the fuck up and listen if he picks up!” I heard a voice say in the background.

“But listen! Have you ever considered the possibility? It would be awesome, right? Think about it!” A loud, shrieking voice shouted in the receiver.

“First the dipshit has to pick up!” I heard a bang and then some more shouting. “Put the fucking acid down you crazy glasses!”

“Hello?” I decided it was time for me to manifest myself.

“HELLO? HELLO? IS SOMEONE HERE?” The loud voice shouted trough the phone. I wondered if the person ever used a phone and knew how it worked. Damn, my ear felt like it was bleeding.

“Yes?” I said a bit unsure. Only a few people knew this number and I was sure I didn't know the person on the other end.

“YES, hello, is this Grisha Jaeger?”  
My mind went blank. After all this time never I heard someone looking for my father. He had been gone for eight years now.

“No. He doesn't live there, I'm his son. Who is it?” My voice was cold; if someone was searching for him then they didn't have to bother me. I didn't want to help whoever was looking for the poor excuse of a father I had.

“Oho! He has a son! Great, maybe you could help us find him! This is Hanji Zoë from Recon Corporation!”

  
  


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks for reading!  
> Haha! I know it was too predicable but I needed this for the plot!  
> Beta credit ti tsukiommon! Thanks! :D
> 
> Comment and kudos are always appreciated!


	4. Gold

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Haha! Early update!  
> Beta credit to Tsukkiommon! Thanks!  
> I just can't wait to write the next chapter ^^

_Ho! He had a son! Great maybe you could help us find him! This is Hanji Z_ _oë_ _from Recon Corporation!”_

I froze.

  
Hanji Zoë. The 'Hanji Zoë’? As in Armin’s idol, Hanji Zoë? That one?

“Hello? Are you still here?” Their voice brought me back to reality.

“Excuse me, but you said you were Hanji Zoë? The scientist?”

“Yes, yes that me! So, about your father!” She sounded very excited.

“Ha yes, sorry but I don't think I could help you find him. It's been about eight years since I last saw him. Why are you searching for him anyway?” Seriously, why?  
Then I remembered what Armin told me this morning; they were searching for a scientist who did research on the eyes.

  
My father was an ophthalmologist.  
Could they be searching for him? Could he be this scientist?

“Ha, well, I can't say anything to you. Sorry, honey! But if you have an idea of where he could be, please contact me!”  
I knew she was going to hang up soon. I had to do something quickly.

“Wait! Wait!”

“Yes? Did you remember something?”

“Not really but, um, you’re searching for his research, right? He told me a bit about it.” The line was silent for a moment.  
Then I heard a loud shriek. My ears were definitely bleeding now.

“REALLY!? REALLY! AWESOME! TELL ME! TELL ME!”

“Yes, but... I don't remember all of what he said. I need to think a little. And...” I didn't have time to finish my sentence before I was cut off by a harsh voice.

“You're kidding right?” The voice I heard earlier spoke, now that I listened carefully it was a man’s voice. “Hanji, this fucker is just playing with you, he doesn't know jack shit!”

“No, no I swear I knew some things! Listen, we could always meet and I will tell you what I know.”

“Too easy, kid,” Said the man’s voice, “Like you would tell us the valuable contents of your father’s research so easily. What do you want in return?” Heh. He caught on fast, didn’t he? And here I thought I could get away without telling them. It was make or break, but I had to try.

“I want to help you on the research. My friend and I both do, in fact. I mean, this is my father’s research after all, I should be allowed to help, right?”

Silence again.

“We'll come to your apartment.” I just had the time to hear a faint “Wait, Levi!” before the line went dead.

I sat on my couch. I couldn't believe it.

  
I was going to meet the amazing Dr. Zoë, and whowever this Levi guy was. He kind of sounded like an asshole though. But it was Recon Corp we were talking about! I could actually have a chance to work with them!

  
I needed to tell Armin. But wait. What if they didn't want us to help? Armin would be devastated. I would just have to wait to tell him when they agreed for sure.

  
Now I had another problem.

  
My father’s research. It was true he told me about it. But I was only eleven maybe twelve at the time. It was nearly nine years ago. How could I remember?

  
I touched the key around my neck. It was a key that my father gave me before he left. I didn't know what it opened but I always kept it with me, to remember all the hardship he put us through, Mikasa and me.

  
She was the daughter of close friends of my parents. After a car crash, where she was the only survivor, my family took her in and she became my adopted sister. She ended up losing her parent’s twice. It wasn't her fault but I knew she always blamed herself for my mother’s death. It wasn't her fault that the robbery went wrong.

  
I chased the sad though out of my head and went to my desk to get some work done.

Impossible. The phone call occupied all my thoughts. They said they'd come to my apartment. They didn't say when, or how. And anyway, how would they know where I lived?

  
I looked out of my window into the night. It was pitch black outside. The light in the street and the building looked like stars, little spots of white in the dark of the city. I wondered what color they were like. Maybe gold? My mom told me gold was a beautiful color, her favorite. She said it was warm, sunny, and gentle.

I looked at the stars again. Definitely not. The lights outside couldn’t be gold. They looked cold, not warm. I looked up at the moon, shining brightly in the night, it wasn't warm either, more like dull, just being here because it needed to be here. The moon wasn't beautiful in my eyes. Many lovestruck described it like the most romantic thing ever. Right. Bullshit.

My eyes were still hurting and my headache was starting to come back. I decided that it wasn't today that I would finish my work and went to bed. Tomorrow was Saturday anyway. I had all weekend to do my work.

I closed my eyes and went to sleep dreaming about my mother's eyes.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks for reading hope you enjoyed!  
> I dond't really like the chapter tbh  
> I hope the next wil be better!  
> (Can you see all the 'hint' I make? you'll see late :p )


	5. Green

The next morning, I woke up to the sound of someone banging on my front door. The hell is wrong with people?

Sparing a glance at my clock on the nightstand, I saw it was only eight in the morning. On a Saturday. Who the hell bangs on people’s door at eight in the morning on a Saturday?

  
Groaning, I got up. Despite just waking up I had the insight of putting on a t-shirt and some pants that were thrown carelessly on my floor.  
I made my way to my apartment’s front door, while noticing that the banging had stopped. Maybe they left. I could go back to bed.

But maybe not.

Just when I was about to head back to my room the banging started again. Of course, as if my luck would allow them to go away that easily. I opened the door a few inches, wondering who it might be at such an ungodly hour. Ungodly in my opinion apparently, because the two people before me didn't seem a bit concerned by the time.

  
The first person was approximately my height. Maybe a little taller. Messy hair put in a high ponytail. Glasses. And eyes. Yes, everyone has eyes obviously, but shit. This person’s eyes. For a second I regretted opening my door, this person looked absolutely batshit crazy. They had dark grey hair the same color as their eyes and a huge smile on their face. Why so happy?

“Hi! You must be Eren! I'm Hanji and this is my friend Levi!” She said in an exited voice.

“Don’t associate me with your crazy ass, shitty glasses,” the man said with a glare while Dr. Zoë pouted.

  
So this was The Hanji Zoë. They didn't look at all like what I expected them to. The grumpy man besides the well-known scientist could be described in one word: black. Black hair, black eyes (but maybe were they more grey), black shirt, black pants. Damn even his expression cried black and mysterious or more like I-don't-want-to-be-here-I'm-pissed-fuck-off. Yeah, he looked pissed. The only thing that wasn't black was his skin. It was white. This man had such a contrast, he was like a walking oxymoron.

  
Without waiting for my answer they made their way in my apartment. Well, okay, nice meeting you too, please come and sit down.  
I closed the door and looked at them both. That's when Dr. Hanji let out a loud shriek and ran to me, her face only inch apart from mine.

“Oh my god! You have such beautiful eyes! Did you know? Look at this! Well you can't tell the difference but I can see it! It's amazing! Can I do some test on you?! Please, Please!”

“W-what are you talking about?” I asked and made a vain attempt to get her away from my face.

“Your eyes! You have heterochromia! And a beautiful one too! Color like that is really rare!”

Okay, so I knew what heterochromia meant, but I never would’ve thought I had it. And nobody ever told me about this, neither my dad nor my mom. And wait, they could see the color? This mean they had found their soul-mate.  
“Your left eyes is green and your right eye is like gold, maybe amber.”

“Get away from him Hanji, we're not here for that.” The Levi guy took Hanji by the collar of her coat and sat themselves on my couch. He was my life savior. Not that I would ever tell him that.

“How do you know my name? And wait, how did you know where I lived?” Because I sure as hell didn't tell them last night.

“It wasn't very difficult, we just had to do a little research on your father and we found the information we needed on you, you have a sister too right?” Mister oxymoron said in a bored tone.

“Yeah, Mikasa’s my adopted sister.”

I took a seat on the loveseat since they both occupied my couch.

“So Eren, can you tell us a bit about you father’s experiments? As you know we work for Recon corps and in my attempt to search a cure to our “condition” I found out that your father did some research on the matter.” Dr. Zoë looked expectedly at me, like I could tell her the secrets of the universe. The thing is, I didn't have time to think more about my father studies.

“Well he told me about the visual cortex, the optic chiasma and the optic nerve. He may have talked about cone cell. He told me they were important for us because it was them that allowed us to see color after “The Revelation”.”

“Yes, well there is nothing new for us there, don't you have something else?” Right Mister oxymoron, forgive me for not remembering things from nearly ten years ago!

“It was a while ago, I don't remember clearly, he just took me to his lab sometimes and told me about his studies. I was eleven or so at the time, I didn't understand all the things that he told me.”

“We don't care, we want new data.” Levi looked more and more pissed, next to him Hanji looked a little disappointed and seemed like they were thinking of something else.

“Well sorry, but you didn't exactly give me time to think about it! You just showed up out of nowhere!” Yeah right Jaeger, shouting it will make things better.

“Yes, sorry Eren!” Hanji said and promptly stood up, “We'll come again, sorry to have disturbed you; I was so excited that I wanted to see you as soon as possible, but we'll go now. Come on Levi!” She walked to the door not bothering to see if Levi walked behind them. Speaking of which, he was currently digging a hole in my head. He slowly stood up and went towards the door. Dr. Zoë was already out of sight.

Just before I closed the door behind him, Levi turned around to speak, but he didn't have time for anything to come out because my head suddenly began hurting. I saw little spot of black before I felt like I was falling.

  
Levi reached out his hands to support me when he saw me falling and I stumbled into his arm. My head just continued to hurt me more and more, I was seeing black. Then when the pain was at its peak, it faded away just like that.

  
I looked up and saw Levi looking down on me with a dumbstruck expression on his face. His eyes looked a little out of it but he quickly focused on me still looking stunned. There was something in his eyes that I didn't recognize, he looked at me like it was the first time he saw me. Why was he looking at me like that, I wasn’t that heavy I hoped. He opened his mouth to speak.

“Do you see it too?”

  
  


 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hahahaha! I was so happy to write this chapter!  
> If you noticed I edited the tag!
> 
> This beta'ed by tsukiommon!
> 
> Kudo are alway appreciated and comment and feed back make my day!  
> Thank for reading! :)


	6. Silver

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> New chapter yay!  
> In Levi POV yay!  
> So finally I have a great beta! :)  
> I would like to thank Penny my awesome beta, her tumblr is attack-on-ass, go see her she's amazing! Again thank you!
> 
> Enjoy! :)

**Levi's POV:**  
  
I just had time to catch the kid before everything went berserk.  
  
I felt like a cold but yet warm breeze was enveloping me, like when you're in a forest: there is this breeze, it's not cold but not quite warm. It's comforting, you feel safe,even if you're lost in that forest.  
  
What the hell was happening to me.  
  
My vision went black. Fucking great. I had this feeling, like, I knew what was happening but I refused to acknowledge it. My heart was pounding in my ears, everything else was silent.  
I felt it. I could see it.  
It was just like if I had a long run, I was panting slightly.  
I was in the forest, surrounded by trees, this peculiar breeze was there. I could hear my heart. I was alone.  
From in between the tree, a light. It grew more and more, grew wider and wider.  
It's hurt. Looking at the light hurt.  
An uneasy felling was creeping in the back of my head. I was still alone. It didn't feel right. Something was missing.  
The light kept growing until it reached me. It was blinding, I couldn't see anything but light.  
 _White_ light.  
  
Then once again I was in my body.  
It was bright. Heart still pounding as I tried to focus on the thing in front of me.  
The thing being this boy, Eren. He was looking at me with a little worry in his eyes.  
Then it struck me. This guy was beautiful.  
He had the most beautiful eyes I'm sure I will ever see. His left eye was a vibrant color and make me think of a forest. His right eye make me think of a sunset.  
  
He had skin that make me want to eat it. His hair was dark in contrast to his eyes.  
The only thing I could focus on was him. Nothing else mattered.  
  
What were these colors? I fucking don't know. When you see black and white your whole life you don't bother to try learning the name of that thing you couldn't distinguish. I knew the name, I just didn't know what they looked like. Try to explain color to a colorblind person, that's not fucking easy.  
I remembered that it must have been quiet while that I was staring. I asked the question that was burning the tip of my tongue.  
  
“Do you see it too?”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for reading!  
> I know this one is a little short, maybe there will be another update this week.  
> Hope you enjoyed this chapter, they might be more Levi POV in the future, I don't know...  
> You can check my tumblr, it's tsukitoyuki, I'll answer all questions you have on the fic (if you have some)
> 
> Thank for leaving kudo and comment are always great to read!


	7. Charcoal

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> New chapter yay!  
> Sorry for the late update! --'  
> Again thank to Penny my awesome beta, her tumblr is attack-on-ass, go see her she's great!
> 
> And 100 kudos guys! I couldn't believe it! It's one of my first fanfic and I didn't expect to have so many people like it! Thank you I love you all! <3
> 
> Enjoy! :)

**Eren's POV:**  
  
 _“Do you see it too?”_  
  
Do I see what? What was I supposed to see? If it was his handsome face then yes, I could clearly see it!  
The guy had high cheekbones, a sharp jaw and sharp eyes. From up close, I noticed that he didn't have black eyes like I thought, but light grey eyes. Even in black and white they were just as beautiful. His dark hair looked silky, I just wanted to touch it.  
He was still looking at me expectedly, holding me.  
  
“Can you see them?” His grip on my hand tightened. He was starting to hurt me. He had a look in his eyes, I couldn't quite place it. It was a hard look, like he was expecting me to say something, yet there was something like wonder and astonishment in his eyes.  
  
I quickly got out of his hold, and stood up. He was still on the floor.  
  
“I don't know what you're talking about, what is there to see?” He looked up at me shocked. What did I say? It's was the truth. He slowly stood up too, shaken up. From what, I didn't know. He stared at me with dejection.  
  
“You're kidding right?” I kept holding his gaze. He seemed to grow more and more pissed as time passed. Then he turned around and rushed out of the door without an explanation.  
Okay, I don't understand what just happened. Why was he mad? What did I do? I closed the door and sat on my couch. What just happened was incredible.  
First Hanji Zoë barged into my apartment with Mister Oxymoron, then they expected me to remember a thing that happened a year ago. It continued with the great Doctor storming out of my apartment, me passing out in Mister Pissed arm and to finish, said Mister Pissed being actually pissed at me. And it wasn't even ten in the morning!  
I decided that it was better for me to just go back to sleep. It was too early for all this shit. I'll definitely tell Armin and Mikasa what happened today on monday.  
  
 **Levi's POV:**  
  
The moment he got out of my hold all the colors disappeared. It was a strange feeling, like waking up from an incredible dream. You know it was incredible yet you can't remember what it was about. It was strange and depressing.  
  
“I don't know what you're talking about, what there is to see?” Was he kidding? He couldn't be telling the truth. How could he not see the colors? I slowly stood up still shaken from what I saw.  
  
“You're kidding right?” He kept holding my gaze like he had nothing else to see. This fucking kid can't even answer when we asked he something.  
  
I stormed out of the apartment without a word. I couldn't believe it. Either this guy was fucking with me or he was completly serious. And the fact that I didn't know which one was the more annoying pissed me even more.  
Hanji was already waiting for me in the car. I got in and slammed the door shut.  
My fucking soulmate. This kid. Fuck my life.  
  
“I don't think he will be of any utility. He obviously doesn't know any more than us about his father or his father's research.” They stated as they drove. “I think it's no use to see him again, even if he did have such beautiful eyes.” Indeed he did have beautiful eyes. I'm sure I'll never see such amazing eyes again, their vivid color, and what was the most surprising thing was the fact that he had two different colors. I'll always remember those eyes.  
  
“Hanji, I think you might want to see him again.” They looked at me from the corner of their eyes. I kept my gaze focused on the road.  
  
“What happened Levi?” I finally turned to look at them.  
  
“I have a problem.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry I really can't write longer chapter!  
> Hope you enjoyed this one, it was a little difficult to write Levi's POV but well...  
> You can check my tumblr, it's tsukitoyuki, I'll answer all questions you have on the fic (if you have some)
> 
> Again thanks for leaving Kudo and the comment you guys write are always the best!


	8. Berry

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> New chapter! And early update!  
> Beta credit to Penny, her tumblr is attack-on-ass, thanks my friend!!  
> It's the hollydays so expect early update! (I'll try)
> 
> Enjoy! :)

“Are you kidding? You're kidding right!? No, I don't believe you! That can't be true!” Armin continued to rant for, like, ten minutes after I told them what happened this Saturday, all the while he was freaking out because “I couldn't have been a good host”, and “they were totally not calling back because of that”, Mikasa kept regarding me.

“Stop it Armin, It's not my fault I couldn't remember! And they came really early to! I was tired, maybe they'll call, I don't know! Stop freaking out please!”

“You could have called Eren! Just a call! I could have seen them, meeting them is dream of my life!”

“I thought the dream of your life was to discover the Cure!”

“I have many dreams Eren! Discovering the Cure is number 1, meeting Dr. Zoë is number 2, being able to read all the books in the library is number 3, working for Recon corps number 4...” After number four I tuned him out and glanced at Mikasa.  
She was still looking at me.

“I'm all right Mikasa, don't worry”

“You're sure?” She inquired. It was true, they didn't ask to many questions about dad so it was alright. And Armin was right, I didn't think they would contact me after what happened.

“It's okay, I'm alright, look, I don't think they will call me so I don't have to think about it anymore.”

“If you say so.” She returned her attention to Armin who was now at listing his fifteen dream which was being the... sexiest scientist? I don't know, I think we lost him somewhere between the sixth and eighth dream.  
Even though she didn't look like it, I knew she was still concerned about the matter. It was just in her nature to worry about me, it could be annoying at times but I knew she meant well. It doesn't bother me like it used to because I now know she was only trying to protect me, even though there was nothing to protect me from.

“... Those are my dreams Eren, see, I don't have only one!”

“Yes, but I didn't see 'change my hair style' in those dreams Armin. Do you plan on having the same hairstyle for the rest of your life?”

“Shut up Eren, my hair is fine!” He said as he adjusted his light grey hair.

“Anyway, Eren, is your head better?” Count on Mikasa for always remembering the things that bothered me. Speaking of my head made me think of the little episode with Mister Oxymoron.

“Well, it feels fine today, but I passed out this weekend because of it though, and something strange happened when I was out of it”

“What?”

“Hum, well, I passed out in this mans arm, his name was Levi I think, and...”

“Levi! You mean like Levi from the Recon corps? The hell Eren, you've met all the best!” Armin interrupted, he was really exited about the whole thing, sometimes he makes me think of a little puppy seriously.

“Will you let me finish please? So I fell in his arms and when I woke up he just kept asking if I was 'seeing them too', and l didn't know what he was talking about”

“Was he hot?”

“ARMIN! I'm telling you I passed out and all you ask me is if he was hot? Seriously?”

“What! I heard he was hot!”

“Where do you even hear that? And yes if you want to know he was a little hot, not bad I guess.”

“I knew it!” What was wrong with this kid I swear!

“How did you feel after?” Ha, at least Mikasa was concerned about my well being.

“I was alright, It was a little strange though, normally it just hurts for a long time but this time, the pain just came and went, it didn't last long but it was really hurting, more than usual”

“Maybe you should see a doctor.” I liked how Mikasa always made suggestions that didn't sound like suggestions at all. She wasn't asking me if seeing a doctor was a good thing to do. She was telling me to go see a doctor.

“It's okay Mikasa, don't worry. Anyway guys, what do you want to eat? Pizza sound good, no?” I suggested.After all, it was Monday night and none of us had eaten yet and I was fucking hungry.

“Yeah, why not...”

The evening went smoothly after that, we ate while watching Parks and Recreation (Ron Swanson makes me think of Mister Oxymoron a little), then Armin and Mikasa went home.  
I slept well, with no ringing phone waking me up.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks for reading! :)  
> So like you saw all the chapter are color and sometimes you'll see weird name... But I assure you those are color!
> 
> Like always any comment are appreciated and I'm grateful for all the kudos!!


	9. Rust

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey! Hello guys!  
> So a really short update in Levi's POV, I'm sorry this chapter is so short!! --' (I'll try to get a longer chapter next)  
> So this one is not beta'ed so if there is any mistake I apologize! 
> 
> Important!!: I recently saw an Ereri fic that have the same name as mine... should I change mine or what? I don't know what to do! Tell me what you think about it!
> 
> Hope you Enjoy!

**Levi's POV:**

 

“This is not a problem.”

He had his chin on his folded hands and was looking straight at me. Pale, grey eyes, and nearly white hair. A strong jaw and a strong posture. Fuck his eyebrows, fuck his pristine hair. Fuck Erwin Smith. In fact no, I wouldn't tap that, and if I did I'd probably have problems with his sniffing soulmate aka Mike Zacharias.

We were currently in Erwin office at Recon corp with Hanji and me and I was already sick of sitting in this fucking chair. Seriously, how could a chair be so uncomfortable! I wouldn't even give it to someone under torture. Or maybe yes.

 

“Yes it is! He is my soulmate Erwin!” I hissed, nobody in this damn room could see the problem or what?

 

“Yes, but you knew that you would met you soulmate one of these day right?”

 

“Yes, yes, but that's not the issue here. He didn't see them, he didn't see the color. I saw them and he didn't Erwin.” He looked intrigued now. Finally.

 

“How could that append. Hanji?” He glanced at them.

 

“I don't know it's the first time that I heard of something similar? Someone touching they're soulmate but not having the Revelation. But something sound familiar thought” They looked conflicted. It could be understandable. The great Dr. Zoë not being able to explain a problem about the Revelation.

 

“Why don't we just call him and ask him to do some test? You'd want to meet him again anyway Levi?”

 

“No. Nope. No way. I don't want a brat for a soulmate, he don't know and he don't need to know.” I've never wanted a soulmate and it wasn't know that I'd want one. Plus a fucking brat wasn't helping the case. I knew some people who were damn fine without soulmate, so I didn't see the problem in not wanting one.

 

“Come on Levi! You've experienced it right! This feeling you get when you see his face in color for the first time!” And there it goes again. Erwin ranting about these great feeling lovestruck always talk about. I was done with it. I didn't do feeling. I was about to get up when the Hanji made an inhuman noise.

 

“HOLY MOTHER OF TITTIES! I KNEW IT! I KNOW WHATS ABOUT!”

 

“Calm the fuck down crazy glasses.” She was bouncing on her chair and finally got up still bouncing. She was completely exited. She was walking to and fro in the room.

 

“LEVIII! You remember Grisha Jaeger work? The one he made experiment on the Lateral geniculate nucleus! You know the Parvocellular cell... What help us to see color!”

 

“Yes I remember, what about it?” She stopped walking and looked straight at me, this crazy glint in her eyes.

 

“I think we found the one he made the experience on.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So Levi's POV hu!  
> I find it a little hard actually to write in his POV but well,  
> And also can someone tell me how do we call Mike! Is it Zakarias? Zacharias? Zakarius? Or freaking Zacharius? Pleas! I need help!


	10. Indigo

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello everyone!  
> I tried to make this chapter a little longer! (Because really last chapter was really short)  
> Beta credit to Penny! Thank you, you really are great! :) (Her tumblr is attack-on-ass go check it!)
> 
> Hope you enjoy this one!

I was doing some homework when the doorbell rang.  
It has been two weeks now that I had the visit of Dr. Zoë and this Levi guy ( apparently he is a well known scientist at Recon corp from what Armin told me).  
Not expecting anyone I went to open the door. And my dear friend, what a sight I had before me! A tall man, with light grey hair and light gray eyes, a strong jaw and a strong eyebrow game. Like really strong game. He scrutinized me with piercing eyes. Suddenly he was pulled aside by someone else.

“HELLO EREN! How have you been! You look great!” Before me stood Hanji Zoë in all her madness. Great. And I hoped I could finish my homework today.

“Oh, hello Doctor Zoë. Yeah, I'm fi-kay.” No, it wasn't what you were supposed to say Eren. Try harder.  
“I mean I'm fine thanks! I'm okay, sorry I'm in the middle of my homework I'm a little tired”

“It's okay sweetie, we all went trough this!” And with that they both brushed past me and made their way through my apartment. Again, please, come inside and take a seat, no! It's not a bother at all! The big guy shot me an apologetic smile. Well at last someone was feeling sorry for me.  
They sat on my couch and I made my way to my love seat.

“So! This is Erwin Smith, creator and founder of Recon Corporation.” They said with a smile. I glanced at the other guy who was still looking at me. Right. So to sum up, I've got the best scientist and the big boss of Recon corp in my apartment, sitting on my couch. Everything was fine! No, it was not. Why was a big shot like him doing here? I barely told them anything that they already know from the last time. I had time to think about it after their vist during the previous weeks and I still don't remember that much about my dad affairs. If came here for that they'll be pretty disappointed.

“Ho, hum- Hello.” I was doing fine so far. Right?

“Hello, Hanji and Levi already told me everything that happened last time they were here, but I would like to ask again about you dad's business. Is that alright?”

“Hum, yes it's fine. But like last time, I don't remember really well. He sometimes would bring me to his lab and explain me the basic about the visual system. I'm sorry I really don't remember all the thing he told me.”

“That's fine” He looked interested. “You told us that he would bring you to his lab? What for exactly?”

“Hum, I-I don't remember, he would show me his scientific equipment and we would talk. It's not really clear in my head somehow.” And there it was again, my headache.

“Well, actually we are here for another reason too” He was observing me closely.

“Huh? What about?”

“Well, Levi said something and it came to my attention that it would be-”

“WE'D LIKE TO RUN SOME TEST ON YOU!” Dr. Zoë how surprisingly stayed quiet the whole exchange interrupted Mr Smith sending him a death glare.  
“You eyes really are particular because of your heterochromia and I was wondering if you'd let us run some tests to see the cause of it! That's all, there is nothing more.” The last sentence was more directed to Erwin than me. I thought for a moment. He looked resigned the next time he spoke.

“That's right. You do have beautiful eyes and they are quite rare, so if you could come by, sometime, for some tests we would really appreciate it.” Well, I had nothing against it. And if it means I had the chance to go to Recon corp I wasn't certainly going to say no.

“Hum, yeah maybe, but it is alright if I bring some friends in case something happens?” If Armin could come it'll be like christmas for him and of course if I was going to make some test, Mikasa would definitely like to come.

“Yes it should be alright even if I highly hope that nothing happen” He glanced at Hanji while saying that.  
Should I feel scared? Probably. Did I? Certainly not because hell yeah we were going to Recon corp!

“Alright! We will leave you in peace then. We'll call you to make an appointment. It was nice seeing you Eren.” He got up of the couch and went to the door,turned around and then reached out to me to shake hands. I took his hand in mine, noticing that he had a firm grip on mine.  
“We'll see you soon!” He smiled opened the door and went out. Dr. Zoë jumped in my arms hugged me and just like they came in, stormed out of the apartment before I could make a sound.  
Well ,surprisingly it went pretty well, even if my head was still pounding lightly. 

I made my way to my room and grabbed my phone. I had a call to do.

“Armin, you will never guess where we are soon going.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So? How was it? Actually I find Erwin pretty hard to write but oh well...  
> You can check my tumblr, it's tsukitoyuki, I'll answer all questions you have on the fic or if you just want to talk! :D
> 
> Kudos are always appreciated and comment and feed back make my day!  
> Thank for reading! :)


	11. Ruby

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry I'm so late! Like really late update, and I have no excuse.  
> So beta credit to Penny (tumblr attack-on-ass) thank you dear friend!  
> So Eren Pov with a little of Armin!
> 
> And guys!!! 3000+ hits and nearly 200 kudos!! Holy shit this is real! I'd like to thank you all, thank you, I love you!
> 
> Hope you enjoy!

“Eren, I'm doing some homework. So you better not tell me that you just wanted me to come with you to eat some Falafel.”

“Wow, Armin! I'm a little hurt here.”

“Eren, I have an exam next week and I still have 2 huge ass book to read so please, talk now or forever hold your word!” Armin said the A word, shit, he must be very stressed. It wont stop me to tease him a little more. I know, I can be an awful friend when I want.

“Okay, okay I was going to say something I'm sure you'll call me god for but, oh well, I guess I'm going to let you study. I'll just ask Mikasa if she wants to go to Recon corp's with me, just the two of us. Bye Armin.”

“Wait! Wait! Wait!” Haha, I smirked, I knew I had his attention now. “What did you say? Going to Recon corp? What! Why didn't you tell me sooner!”

“Well, I wanted to tell you, but someone was too busy doing homework and like you said, you have some big test coming up soon so I won't bother you anymore! I'll just ask Mikasa if she wants to come with me, please don't mind me and you can go back to work.”

“You wait there! I'm coming to your house!” And with that he hung up. It was funny how with just two simple words you could get Armin's attention. Usually, people react to their name, even if they're in a conversation with somebody else, with Armin you just have to say “Recon corp” for him to drop all that he's doing and listen to you.

Ten minutes later Armin barged into my apartment. What wrong with people barging into my apartment today? Seriously! 

“Are we going to Recon corp?” Was he first thing he asked me with an excited voice.

“Hello to you too Armin, thanks for knocking, that was very polite of you”

“Cut the crap! Are we going or not!” He wouldn't pay attention to whatever I had to say unless I answered his question. He was so excited that his pale grey eyes were shining with hope to fulfill one of his dreams.

“Yes Armin, we are going to Recon corporation.” I didn't expect what happened next, Armin suddenly started to shout like a fangirl meeting her idol for the first time, then he cried, then hugged me while crying and saying how happy he was to be my friend. He eventually calmed down and we sat on my sofa. He had this big smile that wasn't going to disappear from his face anytime soon.

“So, tell me, why are we going there?”

“Well, you remember when I said that Dr. Zoë came and asked me about my dad's research, well, they came today too but with Erwin Smith and...”

“ERWIN SMITH! Like as in Recon corp boss Erwin Smith? Holy shit Eren!”

“Yes that one Erwin Smith and I would be very grateful if you could let me continue speaking or you'll know nothing!” He gave me his apologetic smile that no one could resist against. You could never stay angry very long with Armin. I sighed and continued.  
“So, as I was saying, Erwin Smith and Doctor Zoë came just earlier and asked me more about my dad, and I couldn't tell them more of what I already told them, so they asked me if they could make some test on me because apparently my eyes are very special. they said that it was okay if two of my friends came, so here we are, we are going to Recon corp”

“Oh my god, I still can't believe it. Thank you, you and your weird eyes whatever they have!”

“Hey, my eyes are not weird! They said that I had heterochromia! That's all!”

“Really? Wow, yeah, maybe if you look close enough you can see it's not the same shades of gray but, huh, it would be better if we could see in color to see the difference, do you know what tests they'll do?”

“No Armin, I don't know, I'm a little tired to be honest, my head hurts a little”

“Oh, okay, well we'll just have to call Mikasa and then we'll wait for them to contact us for your tests”

“Yeah, lets do that, I hope she won't throw a fit.”

“Don't worry, she knows what Recon corp is about, they are serious people, nothing wrong could happen right?” I doubt that a little about honestly. He's never seen Dr. Zoë and doesn't know how intense they can be. Who knows what they'll do?  
Well, we'll see.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So how was it? Little fangirl Armin going to see his idol!  
> My tumblr is tsukitoyuki so feel free to come and talk to me if you have any suggestion! 
> 
> like always comment and feedback make my day!  
> Thanks for reading! :)


	12. Porcelaine

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The Trio goes to Recon corp...

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Whooohoo! An update! And longest chapter so far!  
> Be happy it won't happen anytime soon! :3  
> So beta credit to Penny! (tumblr attack-on-ass) thanks!
> 
> Enjoy!

So here we were. In front of Recon corporation with Armin and Mikasa. It's wasn't really difficult to convince Mikasa to come, once I told her what happened with Dr. Zoë she immediately said that she would come with me.  
I looked at Armin who was currently fidgeting with a piece of his coat, man, he looked really nervous. He had told me earlier that he hadn't gotten any sleep because he was too excited and then we had to wait for him, were nearly late because he couldn't choose an outfit. Really, he worried way too much.

“S-so... Are we going in?” Even his voice was a wreck, we could hear how nervous he was.

“We are not going inside if you’re this nervous Armin, we don't need you fainting on us you know.”

“I know! Can we please go inside now? I can't wait anymore!” God, he was such a child, it was hard to believe that he acted like this sometimes.

I pushed the glass double doors open and we went inside. Before us was a large hall. The receptionist desk was in front of us, to our left was an elevator and on our right a little lounge with comfy looking love seat and a coffee table. We could see a hallway further on the right, a little behind the receptionist desk.

I went to the receptionist desk were a girl was typing on her computer, she seemed really bored, her name tag read Hitch on it.

“What are you here for?” She asked in a bored tone not even bothering to lift her eyes from her computer screen.

“Um, we have an appointment with Dr. Zoë.” At that she looked at us, a little disdain in her eyes.

“Really? I haven't heard of any appointments with anybody for today”

“Well, they called me and told me to be here today.” She was starting to piss me off, really, can't she just call somebody or just check Dr. Zoë schedule?

“You three? They called you and you came with two people? Afraid to go to an appointment alone?” Her voice was full of mockery. I was getting tired of it already.

“Listen, that not your business what they are doing here, so, now if you could, I don't know, call them or whatever we would be very grateful, thanks!” I went to sit on one of the chairs with Armin and Mikasa while she called someone.

“You didn't have to be so rude Eren.” Mikasa was looking down on me, she was still standing.

“Don't look down on me Mikasa, I'm not a child, and she started it okay?” I puffed, some people, really had the nerve to annoy me.  
We were sitting for about ten minutes when we heard footstep coming towards us. And, oh joy. Guess who it was?

“Get your ass up, Hanji is waiting for you.” Mister Oxymoron! Great! He looked at Armin and Mikasa, but didn't even make a glance in my direction. What was wrong with him?

We got up and followed him, went to the hallway, that had stairs that were going in a downwards direction. At the end was a metal door which could be opened only by a Recon corp ID. He flashed his and the door opened.  
We entered a white room. It was a messy lab, with a lot of people doing jobs in it. He led us through this room to a door on the left. It was another lab, messier than the previous one. A person which I assumed was Dr. Zoë was facing with her back towards us. She didn't seem to have heard us enter.

“Hey, Hanji! The kid is here!” Beside me I heard Armin fidget and straighten up. The poor guy was probably on the verge of fainting.  
Dr. Zoë turned around and finally saw us.

“Eren! Great, you're here! I'm so happy! I'll finally be able to experiment those great eyes of yours” She said the last part while looking at Levi. He just said “tch” and turned to leave the room.  
When he went to turn around, he nearly bumped into my side, and I swear, he looked at me for the first time today. He instantly jumped back, getting away from me. It was like he didn't want to touch me at all costs, before exiting the room he shot a look at me. Seriously what's wrong? What did I do?

“So, you must be Eren's friends!” I looked at Dr. Zoë who was looking at Armin and Mikasa.

“Yes, Mikasa is my adopted sister and Armin is my best friend”

“Really? It's a pleasure to meet you two!”

“The p-pleasure is mine.” Poor Armin he was stuttering and completely red.

“Armin is a grand fan of yours, he read all you research.” At that he turned even redder, and looked at me with mortification. Sorry Armin, but it was too fun to mess with you.

“Really? All of it?” Dr. Zoë seemed very pleased. “That's awesome! Maybe we could talk about it later!” Armin probably would have passed out right now but he was too aware of his idol being here to do so. He did lit up like a christmas tree though, he was so happy! He nodded frantically, like he couldn't speak anymore which was probably not too far from the truth.

“So, Eren, we can start the tests now, but before you have some papers to sign, you know just administrative stuff to say that you are aware of the risks and all, nothing too serious”

“What risks? What are you talking about?” And here Mikasa was, really, she couldn't stop to worry about me.

“Ho, don't worry! Nothing will happen to Eren! It's just in case something goes wrong and to say that he agrees to be a test subject! The test I'll do aren’t harmful, so no need to worry! He's in good hands with me!” Mikasa clearly doubted that and me too. But oh well, we didn't really have our word to say.

We went to the first lab again and up the stairs. In the hall, we took the elevator that was on the left. They pressed the highest level which was 20.

“We're going to Erwin office for the papers.” They explained and once again I had the feeling that Armin was going to pass out. I think this day was extremely emotionally exhausting for him.  
We arrived at our floor and got out of the elevator. Dr. Zoë led us through many hallways before arriving at a door with the words Erwin Smith written on it. They didn't even knock on the door before opening it and go inside.

“Erwin! I got Eren and his friends! Look!” Mr. Smith was currently sitting at his desk and reading some papers. His office was really spacious and looked cozy. There was some photos on the wall of landscape’s which must looked beautiful in his eyes. After scanning the room I noticed that there was already someone in the office. A man was sitting on the sofa on the right of the room. He got up and I noticed how tall he was. He had hair that was a little long but not so long as Armin, they were kind of grey, dark grey and his fringe was partly hiding his eyes.

“I'm leaving Erwin, I'll talk to you later.”

“Right Mike, later.” Mike, apparently, glanced at us before leaving the room.

“It must be Mike Zacharias, he's currently co-owner of Recon corp with Erwin, rumor has it that they are mates.” Whispered Armin in my ear. How the hell did he know that? Really? Did he stalk them or something? I looked at him suspiciously.

Mr. Smith cleared his throat.  
“Ah, welcome to Recon corp. I'm Erwin Smith and...”

“They already know who you are Erwin! It's marked on you door! Just give us the papers so I can go on with my tests!” Erwin sighed and got up.

“Let me at last say hello to them Hanji, before you whisk them away. I’m are not sure of when we'll see them again.” He shot us an amused look. What was that supposed to mean? “I’m guessing you are Eren sister, Mikasa right?” They shook hands.

“Yes, I am. And I hope nothing bad will happen to Eren.” He chuckled.

“Don't worry about that, he should be alright.” He turned then to Armin. “And who might you be?”

“I-I'm Armin sir!” Erwin smiled and extended his hand to shake Armin’s.  
When their hand touched his smile however disappeared, Erwin looked surprised while Armin looked completely out of it. What was happening?

“Armin? Armin?” I tried to snap him out of it, he didn't respond to me. It was like they were frozen. After a few second Armin finally spoke.

“Holy shit!”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for the less than little Ereri interaction! I swear there will be more in the future!  
> And who guessed what happened at the end??? Hu? Hu? It'll be interesting!  
> My tumblr is tsukitoyuki so feel free to come and talk to me!
> 
> Kudo are always appreciated and comment make me want to write more, so don't hesitate to leave one! :D


	13. Pearl

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey everybody! Another "long" chapter! Yay!  
> Also the alternative title for this one is just "Porcelaine intensifi" (like if you see the actual color it's exactly that)
> 
> So, I've seen all the comment on the WinMin, but i feel like you guys forgot another blond...
> 
> Beta credit to Penny! ([attack-on-ass](http://attack-on-ass.tumblr.com/)) thank you! :D
> 
> Anyway, enjoy! :)

“What? What happened Armin? Are you alright?” I asked as Armin was still holding Erwin's hand and looking at him. He hadn't said a thing after his outburst of “Holy shit”. Armin never cursed. Why did he curse?

“Armin, please talk to us.” Mikasa was also worried about him. Besides us, Dr. Zoë wasn't saying a thing and was looking strangely at Erwin, who had the same look as Armin on his face, he was totally captivated by him.  
Armin opened his lips slowly ready to speak.

“So... Beautiful...” His dreamy voice said. What was beautiful? I don't know. I was going to say something when someone barged into the room opening the door violently.

“Erwin! I felt something, what's wrong, are you...” The words that the Mike guy was going to say next died in his throat as he saw the two figures holding hands.  
We all stood here silence, watching the three of them, Erwin and Armin were looking at each other and Mike was looking at both of them.  
He slowly reached forward to take Armin's free hand. I was going to say something again when Mikasa held her hand in front of my mouth silencing me. I gave her a shocked look. She wasn't even looking at me. She was looking at them. Dr. Zoë had now this crazy look on their face but they did their best to contain the energy that was radiating from them to not disturb what was happening in the room. But what was exactly happening?  
And then, I realized. Armin said that Mike was apparently Smith’s mate, then Erwin and Armin shook hands and he felt something. Could it be?

When Mike took Armin's free hand, Armin gasped and turned around to look at him. Holy shit! Was this really happening? It couldn't be real! It wasn't supposed to work like that!

“Wha-Wh... it's... no...” Armin tried to speak but he couldn't even make a sentence. After some time, they finally broke apart, but it was reluctantly on Armin parts, like he didn't want to let either of them let go. Erwin looked around the room, it seemed like he only noticed now that we were here.

“Well, that's a funny turn of events.” He finally said a small smile on his lips. Mike was still looking at Armin. Armin was looking at his feet, a sad look on his face.  
Before anyone could say a word Dr. Zoë exploded. Finally, I wondered how long they could hold it in them.

“What happened? Erwin, tell me! Mike! Armin! What did you feel? Tell me please! Oh, my god I can't believe it! Something like that happened! So interesting!”

“Please Hanji calm down. It's a lot to take in.” Erwin said as he looked at Armin.

“Right! Sorry! I'm just so exited! I'm going to get Levi! He won't believe it!” With that they left the room, leaving the five of us in silence. Awkward.  
Not only my best friend found out his soulmate, but he also had to get two soulmates. It was a case never heard of.

“We'll leave you alone.” Before I could say something Mikasa dragged me out of the room. I just had time to see Mike take Armin's hand and Armin’s face lit up in delight.  
Good for him. Actually the thought of Armin finding his soulmate before me was a little depressing. I always thought I would be the one finding my mate first, but I guess not. I knew Mikasa didn't really care about the whole thing and even if I pretended not to care too much, the idea of not being able to find my mate now was putting me down.

“Don't think too much about it, you still have time.” She said. We found a sort of relaxing room on the same floor and sat down on the couch.

“I know, it's just that, I don't know, I never really imagined how it would be if one of us had a mate. He won't spend as much time with us now.”

“We can't help it, it was bound to happen one day or another, he won't leave us, don't worry about that.” She was right. And I knew deep inside that we couldn't be together forever. Armin was always like a little brother to us, being part of the family without really being part of it. The one we always worried about. If they could make Armin happy then I was fine with it. And here I was, sounding like a poor mother, watching her kid being married.

“Yeah, I know but... Two mates?”

“Ha, yeah. Pretty unusual right?” You don't say.

“I don't even know the probabilities of that happening. It must be close to two percent or something!”

“Your probabilities are shit, don't even try making it. The right probability is 00,075 percent, you were not even close.” We turned around and guess how it was? Levi, yeah you guessed right.

“And how would you know the exact number?”

“It's my fucking job to find these numbers so don't even try to go there.” Oh, so he was one of the scientists who worked on statistics and probability. Must suck, to be honest, working around number all day along.

“Say my work sucks and I'll shove a calculator up your ass.” I didn't even say anything! I flashed him an indignant look. “Your face give all away.”  
He came in the room and sat down on the couch in front of us.

“How long Mr. Smith and his mate has known each other?” Mikasa asked while I glared at him in my corner.

“A little before they found Recon corp, so over five or six years I think.” He looked bored as usual but was looking at me from time to time. “Don't worry about your friend, they'll be sure to pamper him and all, they'll be so sweet to him you'll want to throw up, they'll will do anything to make him feel better.”

“Yeah, but it won't replace five years of relationship.” I stated while looking straight at him.

“It won't, but it'll make it better.” We had a little staring contest before he turned his head away. He sighed, “Really, I never thought the Titan duo would become a trio, even if Armin is way shorter than them.” Mikasa looked at him like he had no right to say a thing about Armin's height.

“It must be cool though, to have two soulmates.” I said dreamily.

“A pain in the ass, yeah, who would like to have two fucking giants for mates?”

“The height doesn't matter, just to know that two people love you is enough.” He just looked at me and snorted. What was so funny? He wouldn't know what it felt like. He didn't have a mate. “What are you laughing about?”

“You know that being soulmate isn't enough for people to fall in love right? You could find your mate and never love them” His gaze was piercing trough me, grey eyes watching me attentively.

“Why are you so pessimist about it, what could go wrong, finding you mate is the most beautiful thing in the word.” Sadness and affliction flashed in his eyes, but the moment it appeared it was gone, leaving me to wonder if I had imagined it.

“Yeah, right, what could go wrong?”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So... what did you guys thought of that? I don't know if there is a name for this ship... anyway, i like it!  
> Poor little Levi, he just want to be loved!  
> My tumblr is [tsukitoyuki](http://tsukitoyuki.tumblr.com/) so feel free to talk to me! I track the tag fic:tosee !
> 
> Thanks for reading and lika always thanks for leaving kudo and comment! I love you!


	14. Cedar

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey! So, another update, a little late, I'm sorry, but I had a hard time writing it and I still don't really like it sooo  
> And holy shit 4000+ hits! Thanks you guys! I never expected this fic to go all this way!  
> Beta credit to Penny! (tumblr [attack-on-ass.](http://attack-on-ass.tumblr.com/)) thanks! <3
> 
> Please enjoy! :)

I was going to ask him what exactly could go wrong when Dr. Zoë came into the room with a stack of paper in their hands.

 

“Eren! Look! I got the papers from Erwin! You just have to sign them and we can start the experimentation!” They waved the papers in front of their face.

 

“What about Armin?” Mikasa, always asking the important questions.

 

“Ho! Don't worry about him! He's with Erwin and Mike! Now, shall we go?” They cheerfully said while turning around. We got up and followed them. Levi got up as well and went after us.

 

When we were back in Dr. Zoë lab they asked me to sign the paper. Mikasa was sitting in a corner watching our every movement, Mister Oxymoron was leaning against a wall not looking at anything in particular, he seemed lost in thought.

 

“Now Eren, could you please sit there and we will just do some basic sight tests!”

 

For the past 20 minutes they asked me if I could see pictures or letters at different distance. They concluded that my sight was very good.

 

“Okay! Now we will start the serious stuff!” God, they looked downright crazy now. What was the serious stuff? They led us to another room were a lot of computers and some weird equipment was everywhere. I guessed what they were going to do with that but just waited to see if I would be right.

 

“We will do an EEG!” Fuck, I knew it. I hated electroencephalogram. This shit is like putting 100 captor on you head and then you'll be all sticky. I didn't like that.  
Plus something’s weren't adding together, but I guessed they knew better than me what to do.  
After 10 minute of putting the captor on my head they sat me in front of a computer screen.

 

“Now, you see the screen right? Different forms will appear. If you see a change of color press the button. You will only see different shades of black and white but in fact it's a lot of different colors.”  
I did this for some time, I saw Hanji frown from the corner of my eyes. I was doing my best. What was I doing wrong? They suddenly looked like they had found the solution.

 

“How do you feel right now Eren?”

 

“Hum good, everything is alright.” My eyes were hurting a little from being in front of a white screen for too much time but that wasn't anything to worry about, it was even pretty normal.

 

“Great! Well then...” They turned to Levi who was currently watching some computer screen displaying my brain and the activated area when they were asking me to do a specific task. He looked up a frown on his face.

 

“What is it shitty glasses?”

 

“Levi, could you hold Eren’s hand and measure his pulse?” They had a weird look on their face like they had asked something private that only Levi and they knew about.

 

“No way Hanji, I'm not touching him you know that!” He looked completely disgusted with the idea.

 

“Hey! What wrong with touching me! I'm not dirty!” What was wrong with him and not wanting to touch me, really?

 

“Shut up you don't know what we are talking about you stupid kid!” What? What was happening for the love of god? They were literally talking about him touching me, what could it be about? Today was so confusing. I was starting to wonder if people were going crazy.

 

Levi and Hanji had a silent conversation only looking each other in the eyes. But something else was bothering me.

 

“Hey, I don't mean to sound like an asshole or anything but, why are we doing all this? I mean, you're doing test for my heterochromia right? Shouldn't be just taking blood sample to look at my gene and that's all? It's doesn't have anything to do with the primary visual cortex normally. It's only a question of genetics, isn’t it?” I frowned while saying that. What they were doing didn't make sense at all, it looked like they searched something else.

 

“Ho Eren, yeah you're right, but due to the achromatopsia another factor may have caused the heterochromia. I'm just checking in case! I'll take your blood sample another day! What could we possibly do other than that?” They looked at Levi with a pointed look, like if their response would mean more to him than me.

Okay, that was suspicious, but they also marked a point. Achromatopsia could have messed up my eyes and different factor could have played a role in my heterochromia.

Levi sighed and approached me. He sat down next to me and took my hand to measure my pulse. His face crunched up like he was experiencing something uncomfortable.

 

“Are you alright?” I asked out of concern.

 

“Yes, I'm fine, now shut up and do what this crazy ass asks you to do.” Wow, okay. I'm never again asking him how he's doing. Dr. Zoë asked me the same question that before and some other. We did this for a little longer than before and quickly my head started pounding. It was hurting more and more the time passed.

 

“Alright, we'll stop now. How are you feeling Eren?” Levi quickly let go off my hand and stood up going to his former seat.

 

“Huh, my head hurt pretty badly actually, it's pounding like crazy.” I also was starting to fell light headed.

 

“Do you want to go home Eren?” Mikasa was suddenly by my side, watching me with worried eyes.

 

“Yeah, I think I need to stop for today. Is that alright?” I asked Dr. Zoë. They looked a little bit disappointed but quickly hid it.

 

“Of course Eren! We had a lot of things done today and I'll have to look more closely at it! So you can go home, maybe we'll do other test next week.”

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> And here we have Hanji experimenting on poor Eren.  
> I hope this chapter was okay because I really didn't like it.
> 
> Here's my tumblr : [tsukitoyuki](http://tsukitoyuki.tumblr.com/), please come talk to me, I like talking to people!
> 
> Thanks for leaving kudos, and I love your comment so please keep doing that! ;)


	15. Purple

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Yay, an update!  
> So for this chapter, beta credit to Tsukiomnon! (tumblr [tsukiomnon](http://tsukiomnom.tumblr.com/) ) Thanks a lot! :D
> 
> Please enjoy this chapter, it was quite interesting to write it! :)

In the end, Mikasa and I went home without Armin, something about him needing to talk about his soulmate situation and Dr. Zoë wanting to do tests on him too.

My head was still pounding. This thing was actually starting to bother me but I figured I couldn't do anything about it. I sent a text to Armin, telling him to meet us at my apartment when he was done with his mates.

Once we arrived at my apartment, I went to take something for my head. Mikasa sat on my love seat and I threw myself on the couch, taking the whole space.

“Are you feeling any better?” She asked, her voice worried.

“Yeah, I'm better, thanks Shane.” She huffed and buried her face in the scarf that rarely left her neck. She was conscious about the small scars from the car accident that killed her parent that were left there. She never really took of her scarf because of that, even now that the scars weren't that visible but from habit she kept wearing the scarf. “When do you think Armin will be back?”

“I don't know, soon I think.” The painkiller was taking effect and I was starting to feel tired. I decided that in the meantime, I would take a little nap.

“I'm taking a nap Mikasa, if you need anything you know where things are.” She nodded and I closed my eyes, drifting off to sleep.

I woke up feeling a little strange; I didn't open my eyes though. You know when sometimes you close your eyes and you feel like you can see behind your eyelids? Like if its space and you see a million stars? Well, let’s say I had a dream like that. Except I felt like there was more to it, like I didn't only see all these stars, like I saw something that I never saw before. I couldn't quite place it, but it was bothering me, I was missing something big, I knew it. But what? The more I thought about it, the more it became difficult to remember. Like you want to grasp something, you know you can touch it, but every time you think you have it in your hand, it slips through your fingers.

“Hey, looks like he's awake, he's making that 'I'm thinking too hard' face!” I opened my eyes when I heard Armin's voice.

“Hey! How long have you been here? You should have woken me up!” He was sitting on the arm of the couch; I sat up so he could sit next to me.

“Oh, not too long ago...” He's voice was suddenly quiet. I stared at him for some times, his cheeks actually had a little color on them, they were lightly dark grey and he kept looking down.

“So... How was it? Seeing it?” His head shot up, a dreamy look on his face.

“God, Eren, it's so beautiful! When he took my hand! God! And his eyes! Their eyes! I didn't see a lot of thing but I can say that their eyes are the most beautiful thing in the world! It's blue and brown! They taught me color! It's amazing, there is so many of them! And they are so nice! Mike is actually a really quiet guy, but he's so sweet! And Erwin actually make me feel better about the whole thing! I-I can't believe how lucky I am to have them, they are the best mates I could've asked for. It's actually a little sad when I have to leave their hand.” While saying that his eyes kept shining, he was really passionate about it. His gaze softened while saying the last part. You could tell he already felt really attached to them.

“It's great Armin, we're very happy for you.” Mikasa said with a smile on her face.

“Thank you, I don't want you to think I'm leaving you behind, it just that, heh, I want to be by their side all the time! And they showed me all Recon corp too! It was awesome; we kept holding hand so I could the color. They already don't need each other to see them. Actually I was a little scared to be an intruder in their relationship, but they made me feel better about it. We sort of have a d-date the day after tomorrow...” Oh, god, Armin was blushing like crazy, he's face was a dark shade of grey, it was really cute! I was genuinely happy for him, he seemed content.

“Hey, that's awesome Armin, Mikasa's right! We are behind you for this! You can count on us!” He smiled and looked a little relieved too, like he was afraid one of us wouldn't approve of it. How could we? Yeah, he wouldn't spend as much time with us than before, but he was happy and that’s what mattered. Now, I was going to ask the real question. “But, I keep wondering if you are really ready for that Armin.” He suddenly looked confused.

“Ready for what Eren, what are you talking about?” Oh my, he was frowning now.

“You now, two soulmates is a big responsibility, are you really prepared for that?”

“What are you talking about? Mikasa what is he talking about?” She shrugged but I knew that she was expecting what I was about to say by the really small smile on her face.

“You know Armin... Threesome?”

Armin choked on hair and his face suddenly became a dark shade of grey. Mikasa was laughing and so was I. Armin was definitely too easy to tease.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So... How was that? I swear they'll be more ereri in the future!
> 
> My tumblr is [tsukitoyuki](http://tsukitoyuki.tumblr.com/) please, come an talk to me, I like talking to new people! Also I track the tag #fic:tosee 
> 
> Thanks for leaving kudos, and I love your comment so please keep doing that! ;)


	16. Scarlet

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello everyone! I hope you had a nice Christmas!  
> So, this one is bit long (ha ha) and as promised, more Ereri interaction!  
> Beta credit to [attack-on-ass](http://attack-on-ass.tumblr.com/) , thanks a lot!!! <3<3
> 
> Please enjoy! :)

The next week, was relatively normal, I went to class, tried my best not to sleep in Mr. Shadis lectures, went to lunch with Mikasa and Armin, studied and tried not to think too much about the finals coming.  
Armin would often tell us about his dates with the two giants.  
He seemed to be very pleased with how they were working things out. He told us about the thing he felt each time they touched, the colors he learnt, he told me that when he saw a picture of me while holding Mike's hand he saw my heterochromia. They also made him visit Recon Corp, Dr. Zoë would often be with them and Armin could talk to them about their research.

All was great for him. I was actually feeling a little jealous. Though I told myself that my time would come too.

Recon corp called sometime in the week to say that I had an appointment with Dr. Zoë Saturday afternoon.  
I was dreading a little our appointment because well, how do I put it. I knew that they were going to do a blood test. The thing was I was afraid of needles. Yeah, I know. I was okay with vaccine but catheter, drip and all was a total no no. Stick a needle in my shoulder and I was okay, stuck a fucking needle in my vein and I will fucking faint! I'm not kidding! If I had a blood test to do Mikasa and Armin would literally drag me to the doctor and then I would faint after he took my blood. You'd say a young man like me wouldn't faint just from that, but no! I just can't! Don't even talk to me about it. Every time someone tests blood, taking a blood sample I just internally scream!  
God, I really wasn't looking forward to that.

Saturday came sooner than I expected and I was standing in front of Recon corp once again. Armin didn't come because he had an exam he wanted to study for, Mikasa had a competition in whatever sport she was doing.  
So here I was, entering the building and making my way to the front desk.

I was about to ask the Hitch girl about Dr. Zoë when a voice called me. Well, not really called but I got the idea.

“Hey, kid!” I turned around to see Levi standing near the hallway that led to the labs. He beckoned me to come his way. “You're late.” He stated and then turned around and down the stair. I hurried after him.

“Hey! I was told to come in the afternoon so I just came now, no one told me I had a time to come!” He didn't turn and continued to walk.

We went to Dr. Zoë lab, and I was surprised to find that we were the only one there.

“Shit for brains had some shit to finish so it might take a while before they come back.” He went to sit on a chair and decided to ignore me, deciding that his phone was more interesting.

“Hum, would you happen to know what tests I'll be doing today?” He looked at me from his phone apathetically.

“They'll take some blood sample and I don't know for the rest.” He then went back to looking at his phone.

Hu ho. Okay. I shouldn't think about it. I leaned against a wall, feeling a little lightheaded. Oh god no. I couldn't faint now. Not in front of him! I closed my eyes and tried to relax. It's wasn't working, I felt like my mind was slowly flying away. I sat down on the floor  
I heard a chair move and a presence in front of me.

“Hey, are you alright?” I opened my eyes and saw Levi looking down on me (Ha! He should savor this moment because it wasn't happening anytime soon!) a bit of worry in his eyes.

“Hum, yeah, no, I think... I don't know.” I closed my eyes again.

“What's wrong?” I reopened my eyes and he actually crouched down beside me.

“Hum, I'm just trying to relax, I d-don't really feel well.” My voice was a whisper.

“What? What's wrong?”

“I-I...” Could I say that to him? Could I actually tell him my biggest fear? “I can't handle needle, I'm afraid of them.” I saw his eyes slightly widen and a little concern creep it's way in it.  
Slowly, very slowly, like he was afraid of something he reached for my hand. He took it in his and held it.  
Then he crushed it, hard.

“What the fuck! What are you doing? Let me go!” He didn't let go and continued to squeeze my hand. “Hey! Let's my hand go!” My free hand tried vainly to pry his hand away and he took his other hand to grab mine. Now both my hand was in his death grip. He didn't seemed fazed at all by me thrashing around, trying to get free. He continued to hold my hand.  
Finally after some time and some struggle, I actually managed to get out of his grip, or he let me go, I don't know. The important thing was that my hands were free.

“What’s wrong with you?” I asked anger tainting my voice. He didn't move still crouched beside me.

“How are you feeling now?” He just asked like what happened was totally normal.

“Wha- What? What do y-”

“How are you feeling?” He asked again, insisting. I closed my mouth and though about it.  
I was surprised to find that I wasn't feeling lightheaded anymore. I was rather feeling nice, except for the angry feeling I had against him.

“Fine. I'm feeling fine.” A small smile appeared on his face but disappeared instantly.

“See? I wouldn't say that you 'can't handle' needles, you clearly have a phobia, even if it's still not too developed. In this case of phobia have two phases; first a brief acceleration of the heart rate, then it’s starts to beat slower and you blood pressure drop. And these cause fainting. What would have happened if you continued to calm down?” He slowly rose and stood up, looking down on me.

“I would have fainted, my heart rate wouldn't have gotten up and I would have passed out.” He nodded his head slightly.

“Yeah, so in order to avoid that you have to accelerate your heart rate, therefore the struggle I put you trough, I could have tried to get you angry, it would have worked too.” Well, it was surprising he actually tried to help me. Mr Oxymoron the guy who didn't want to touch me tried to help me. Was this a miracle? Did I actually faint and all that was a dream? He offered his hand to help me get up.  
This was definitely not a dream. I grabbed his hand and got up.

“Hum, yeah, thanks, though you could have warned me or something” I scratched my head awkwardly.

“I guess I could have, I don't do this shit every day thank god.” His bored tone was back and he was staring at me, though slightly dazed, I didn't know why.

“Ha, no kidding! I would have never guessed!” I gave him a grin and he scoffed.  
Dr. Zoë choose this moment to barge into the room.

“Hey! Sorry Eren I'm a little- Levi? Why are you two holding hands?” Levi quickly retracted his hand away from mine and took a step back. I hadn't noticed that we were still holding hand until they pointed it out.  
Dr. Zoë grinned and came our way.

“Anyway...” They sent a knowing look to Levi who shrugged it off and went back to sitting in his chair, a scowl appearing on his face. “Eren, are you ready for today test?”

Shit. I almost forgot about the blood test. Levi managed to distract me from it.  
Oh well, we'll see. I was already starting to feel a headache coming.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So yeah, Eren is afraid of needle and so I am. I can't handle thing that goes in my vein and wound. This is called Blood-injection-injury type phobia. Eren has that but I don't, I can't handle it but I'm not on the phobia stage.  
> The way Levi calmed Eren is one of the way it can be cured, actually it's the Applied Tension Technique  
> (which is a little diverted here). It's the Cognitive Behavior Therapy way, it's also include gradual exposure but other way to cure it exist too.  
> So if any of you have this know that you can cure it, you can even do this alone even if the best thing is to do a professional counseling.
> 
> My Tumblr is [tsukitoyuki](http://tsukitoyuki.tumblr.com/), if you want feel free to talk to me! :)  
> Like always thanks for leaving kudos and comment! I love them, keep doing that! :D


	17. Peach

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Happy New Year to you all! I hope that 2015 will be a better year for you, full of amazing experiences!
> 
> Alright, I'm sorry for this late update, (very very late) but I had finals, still have so the next chapter might be late too.  
> Here we have more Ereri interaction as promised!
> 
> Beta credit to Penny (tumblr [attack-on-ass](http://attack-on-ass.tumblr.com/))

In the end, I managed not to faint. I closed my eyes through the whole thing and balled my hands into fits.  
I would even say it went pretty well. Well, except for that awful felling of a needle going through my skin onto my vein.  
But well. Levi stayed through the whole thing, keeping a close watch on me. If I didn't know better I would have said that he was worried about me. He took care of me just before so it might be that. Maybe he's not as much as an asshole as I thought.

“Hey Eren, I need to prepare the lab where you'll do the other test, do you mind staying with Levi for a while?” Dr. Zoë asked while leaving the room. “Oh in fact, Levi, go with Eren to the cafeteria, he will need to drink and eat something because of the blood test!” And with that they were out of the room.

“Alright brat. We're going, follow me” We went through the big lab and up the stairs to take the lift. My head was pounding a little. It was a little strange though. Normally, my head would hurt once in a while, like every month or so, but here it was hurting more and more often.  
Now that I thought about it, it always occurred when I was with Levi. Ha! So this guy was really getting on my nerves, literally.

“Oi! Are you alright?” He was watching me with what seemed like worry in his eyes. So maybe we really cared for me after all.

“Yeah, I’m fine, my head just hurts a little, that’s all” He nodded and got out of the lift.  
He led me through a long hallway before we entered the cafeteria. It was huge, with some tables to the left and the counter and register to the right. The walls where entirely made of glass, giving us an incredible view of the city.

“Come on, you can get whatever you want” We went to the counter, I took an apple and an orange juice. I wasn't really hungry so I guessed that would be it. Levi took a water bottle and then grabbed my food and paid for them. Without bothering to look at me he went to sit at a table.

“Oh, thanks, you didn't have to pay for it you know” I sat in front of him and grabbed my apple. I was told they were in different color and each color had its own flavor. Mine was shiny and lightly grey. I honestly had no idea what color it could be.

“These shit are free for me. Are you going to eat it or look at it till it rots?” I looked up to him, he must have watched me the whole time.

“Do you ever wonder how things would look in color?” He seemed surprised by my random question but quickly hid it.

“Not, really, I figured that either one day I'll know or I'll never find out.” He opened his bottle and started to drink.

“You never imagined what it would be like to see a sunset or whatever? Isn’t that's a little sad?” I bit into my apple. Whatever color it was, it was really good.

“Not really, not if you think that it will become your everyday life once you find your mate, it will be so common that you'll forget that you once thought it was extraordinary”

“I'd like to see the colors though” I whispered and I saw his hand twitch like he wanted to grab mine, but it remained by his side. Instead he looked at me disgusted.

“Don't talk with your mouth full, it's disgusting” I then proceeded to slowly chew with my mouth open for him to see inside. He looked so horrified, it was really funny. I swallowed and shot him a grin. I admit that I could be a real kid sometimes.

“Anyway, what info did you find from my father exactly? It's strange that you found one of his work pieces when he's missing now”

“I don't think I have the right to tell you, you know” He looked at his nail and shrugged like he was dismissing the topic.

“Come on! I want to know! It's my father work anyway, plus I'm sure that Erwin told Armin about it”

“Then why don't you ask your friend then?”

“Because if Erwin told him not to tell me he won’t! I'm sure that he won't get very mad at you, you're friends right? Plus it seems like you're some sort of big shot here, so you must know!” He looked at me with his piercing eyes, actually it was a little scary, being looked like that as if he could see through me. He lowered his gaze and finally spoke.

“He found out another mechanism that happen during The Revelation that we didn’t know about.”

“What it is? I thought we already knew everything about that”

“Yeah, we thought so too but apparently during the first touch, some chemicals are released that make you like your soulmate more. It's like Dopamine but specialized in making you more inclined to fell in love with your mate” He hadn't looked up through the whole thing. It was weird though, something didn't make sense.

“But we know that some soulmates never fell in love right?” At that he finally looked at me.

“Yes, it's true, it seems that depending on the couple, more or less of this substance is released. It would explain it but, like Hanji said, we don't have all the data, that's why we asked for your help. Some parts are missing”

“Oh, okay. I'm sorry then, but I don't think my father ever spoke to me about that”

“Yeah, that's what we figured out, it would have been too complicated for an 11 year old.” After that he continued to drink while I looked at my apple that had since been long forgotten. The part where I had bitten was becoming more and more dark. “You could have lied you know” I glanced at him. “You could have told us some made up thing to enter Recon corp and work with us, that's what a lots of people do”

“I don't like lying, I hate it when people lie to me so I don't lie to people either” I looked straight at him, he averted my gaze and looked at his bottle.  
My aversion for lies came from long ago, from a phrase I would never forget 'I'm going to work Eren, take care of Mikasa and yourself' Right, well he must have been busy with work for not reappearing for the last 8 years.

“Finish eating, we’ll go back down to see if crazy ass is finished setting up the tests” I finished eating in silence not looking at him, but felling his gaze on me.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> How did you find that! Levi is in deep shit if Eren were to happen to know he lied to him... hahaha
> 
>  
> 
> My Tumblr is ,[levis-diddly-dong](http://levis-diddly-dong.tumblr.com/) if you want feel free to talk to me! :) (Yeah, I changed my url and I regret nothing!)  
> Like always thanks for leaving kudos and comment! I love them, keep doing that! :D


	18. Sangria

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello everybody! So my finals are finally over and the new semester start!  
> Which hopefully mean, more regular update!  
> Thanks for [gondolinnel](http://gondolinnel.tumblr.com/) for the proof reading!
> 
> And OMG! Guys! 300+ Kudos and 6000+ hits! Thank you! Really, I never thought I'll go this far with this fic!
> 
> About this chapter, part of me really like it, but another part don't... I feel like thing are rushed, so I don't know. Tell me how you felt about it!
> 
> Please, enjoy! :D

During the last few week, I kept coming more and more to Recon corp.  
At first, Dr. Zoë made me pass several tests, going from IRMs to simple sight tests. Though they didn't tell me anything about whatever they may or may not have found.

Then Armin got an internship at Recon corp (guess how he did it, surely it didn't involve his two giants of soulmates being the owners of Recon corp). But in the end it was benefitial for me too because I was also offered an internship.

During my stay at Recon corp., Levi always found a way to be with me every time I passed some test.  
Actually, he wasn't as bad as I had initially though. Sure he was rude and crude and his sense of humor might be dubious at times (most of the time actually).  
But he also had his little habits.  
Like, how he always took black coffee but secretly added a lot of sugar and cream to it when he though no one was looking; how he always washed his hand and how his office was always clean (yes, I managed to get inside); how he furrowed his eyebrows when he was working and never paid attention to his surrounding (one time I managed to replace his sugary coffee with black one and cover his desk in post-it without him noticing, of course he was mad afterwards); how he would smile a little when I'd vainly try to sass him.  
The later made me actually smile too.  
Why? Maybe because he was in fact a really sweet and caring person below all these layer of crudeness.

Yeah, I admit that I may have developed a crush on him. Not that it would ever work because you know, soulmates happen.  
It didn't stop some people from dating even though they hadn't found their mate yet. I can't tell you all the drama that happen when you date someone and suddenly find your mate. Shit go bad when it occurs.  
So I buried this ever growing crush (the fact that he was pretty hot didn't help) and continued to pester him because it was like a game between us.

It was lunch break and once again I was in Levi's office. I don't really know how it came to that, but one day Moblit (Hanji assistant and soulmate who was also my mentor for the internship) ditched me because his crazy mate needed supervision. So he just dropped me off in Levi's office telling me to eat with him and that he'd be back later. Of course Levi threatened me to many painful deaths if I ever happen to dirty his precious office. And now it sort of became a habit for me to go to his office to eat lunch. You'd thought he would complain about me, but I figured that if he really didn't like it he would tell me to fuck off. So now, I was eating with him every day.

I was moping a bit because today I was supposed to eat with Armin, (that little coconut head had Dr. Zoë for mentor, once again we don't ask how he got them). Turns out he had plans with his mates and forgot about it. The last few day, he had always been busy either with his mates or at the lab working with Hanji.  
The rare times I saw him he seemed happy, so I was glad for him that all worked out for the best. Yet, I couldn't help myself to think that he was distancing himself from Mikasa and me. Speaking of which, she was currently somewhere in Poland attending a competition.  
Needless to say I wasn't feeling really good today.

“Why do you look like someone just put shit in your sandwich?” Ha, Levi, as delicate as ever.

“Ha, it's nothing, don't worry, do you want some of my shit sandwich though? You look like you could eat a little more you know”  
He snorted and continued to eat his sort of pie that wasn't exactly one because it was upside down and apparently I was too much of a troglodyte (who even use that word) to understand that. He called it Tarte Tintin or Tetin or whatever, it was some French pastry.

“I could take you with only one hand and my eyes closed I'm sure. But seriously what's wrong, you've been pouting since you came in and the negative waves you emit are starting to disturb me.”

“I'm not pouting” I mumbled and I heard him chuckle. “I was supposed to eat with Armin today, but he ditched me to be with Mike and Erwin, it's been at least 2 week since we ate together.”

“Well, he's busy now, and maybe he want to spend as much time as he can with his mate?” He pouring himself a cup of coffee.

“Yeah, I know, but that’s not a reason to ditch me or Mikasa, we hardly see him these day” I started to count the number of sugar cubes he put in his coffee. One. Two.

“Wouldn't you like to spend all your time with your mate if you could?” Three. He hesitated, but put a forth sugar in his cup.

“Yeah, but like, I wouldn't eat with them all the time, wouldn't that be boring?” He looked at me like I was some sort of idiot, shook his head and put cream in his coffee. He really had a sweet tooth. “Would you spend all your lunch with your soulmate?” He sighed and took a sip of his coffee.

“I don't know if I want to strangle you or make you eat you sandwich by your nose, stupid ignorant little shit” He muttered the last part but I was still able to catch it.

“Who's little here” I whispered.

“What the fuck did you say?”

“Nothing! Drink you black coffee” He made a little 'tch' and continued to drink. “Hey, actually there was a question I always wanted to ask”

“What it is”

“How tall are you?” He choked on his coffee and I laughed. Ho god, he started throwing his pen at me and I can assure you that he had a good aim.  
“I'm kidding! I'm kidding, calm down!” He stopped throwing at me and calmed down. “You know when we first met, I sort of passed out” I saw him tense up. “Why did you ask if I was seeing them too? What was I supposed to see?” He averted his eyes and looked down on his cup. His brow where furrowed, like he was having an internal struggle which seemed to be the case. He finally looked up.

“Eren, you know, in fact...” He didn't finish his sentence because suddenly Hanji was bursting through the door.

“EREN! Come on! We have tests to do today!” They stopped and looked around “Did I interrupt something?”

“No, no, you can take him” He looked down once more at his cup.

“Okay, then, I'll see you tomorrow Levi!” I got up and walked to the door.

“Yeah” He didn't even look up while saying that.

Whatever he was going to tell me what happened that day, he didn't have the time, but I'm sure he'll tell me if I ask again tomorrow.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> How was it? Will Eren finally know? Haha! Who know? (I know...)
> 
> Please, leave a comment, I really like them and they make my day!  
> Thanks for reading!
> 
> My tumblr is [levis-diddly-dong](http://levis-diddly-dong.tumblr.com/), feel free to come and talk to me!


	19. Rosewood

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Alright!  
> A tiny little ass chapter in Levi's POV to see what he think of all that!  
> Beta credit to [gondolinnel](http://gondolinnel.tumblr.com/) thanks a lot! <3
> 
> Please enjoy! :D

**Levi's POV**

 

How did it come to this? I really didn’t know. What I did know was that nearly every day, this brat was eating with me in my office.

Actually, it didn't bother me as much as I thought it would. Sure, at first I told him that if he ever made a mess while eating there then there would be consequences that I was confident he wouldn't like.

Nowadays we ate together and did small talk, just like an old married couple. We looked like Erwin and Mike and their new mate, all sugary and sweet. Disgusting.

 

However, I couldn't help but notice little things about him. Like how his eyebrows would furrow when he was talking about things that angered him; how he could be so passionate and how his eyes would light up when he was talking about his studies or friend; how his ears would turn a darker color when he was lying; that he didn't like tea or coffee but loved infusion (mint and vervain was his favorite); how his smile would illuminate his face every time I pulled a shitty joke; how he was the most beautiful thing in the word when our hands would accidentally brush against each other.

 

I was aware that I was currently nursing a giant crush and doing nothing to get rid of it.

The thing is, as a soulmate, it's not really easy to _not_ like your mate seeing as some chemical make it nearly impossible.

But do you want to know what the saddest thing in all this was? Some couples don't have this hormones release which makes them naturally fall in love with each other – the amount of chemical released varies for each and every couple, and you can actually measure how much this chemical is produced.

I had of course asked Hanji to measure how much of this shit there was in my system. And guess what? A very small amount of it was in my body – close to nothing.

The amount wasn’t large enough to have any ‘magic’ effects on my judgements. That’s right, that means that I only had myself to blame for this crush.

Eren was completely oblivious to the fact that we were soulmates and he was spending a lot of time with me despite being the one that criticized Armin for devoting his time for his mates.

When he asked me about that question from the first time we met, I was ready to tell him. I knew how much the kid hated to be lied to, and to be honest, hiding that we were mates was a pretty fucking big lie. I was kind of scared of his reaction – how will he handle the fact that I had not only blatantly lied to him, but I had also withheld important information that was most certainly concerning him and could change his life? He would be pissed for sure.

I was relieved when Hanji chose that exact moment to interrupt.

Maybe I'll tell him another time, maybe I'll casually take him on a date (without telling him it's a date obviously). There was this nice tea room in town that I knew of, where Eren could get his favorite infusion and I could get those pastries that I loved.

Maybe I'll take him there sometime. Maybe I’ll tell him the truth.

That seemed like a good idea.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So what did you think of that?  
> Also you must know that the update me be less and less frequent (as if they were before). But I don't know anymore what to think of this fic and sometimes I just don't want to write it anymore, so yeah, i need a lot of motivation for just one chapter.
> 
> Please, leave a comment, I really like them and they make my day!  
> Thanks for reading!
> 
> My tumblr is [levis-diddly-dong](http://levis-diddly-dong.tumblr.com/), feel free to come and talk to me!


	20. Raisin

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Wooooow!  
> Look who's back after nearly two week of nothing!  
> Me!
> 
> Anyway, I hope you guys like this chapter, I don't really know how i feel about it...
> 
> And! 7000+ hit on this fic and this is the 20th chapter! Thank you for sticking with me and continue reading this, I never thought I'll go that far!
> 
> Thanks for [Sabi](http://gondolinnel.tumblr.com/) for the editing, you really helped me! <3
> 
> Please enjoy!

**Eren's POV**

 

Levi was eating pastries while I was reading my class notes. Lately he had been a bit on edge and I didn't know why. He was easily irritable and would snap at the tiniest things.

Today he kept glancing in my direction furtively but wasn't really discrete about it considering I managed to take notice of it.

He brushed his fingers through his silky hair and sighed, looked at his work on his desk and sighed again before looking my way once again, but this time I caught him staring.

We held gaze for some time before he finally sighed again and looked down.

What was bothering him?

 

“Why are you sighing so much, do you want something?” He stared at me before answering.

 

“Did Hanji tell you the results of all these test?”

 

“Huu, no, they didn't. Actually I was thinking about asking them about it. I mean, with all the testing, surely they must have found something right? Why do you ask though? You should know, you work with them”

 

“Yeah...” He resumed working on his papers, not paying attention to me.

I assumed that the conversation was over. I was kind of getting slightly exasperated here, why would he ask a question when he knew the answer already?

 

“Well, this was fun, but I think I'll go back to work” He didn't even look at me while I got up and headed for the door. Well, okay then, if he wanted it that way. I left the room and went in the direction of Moblit lab.

 

**Levi's POV**

 

This was getting completely out of hand and ridiculous.

How could asking someone out be so complicated? And how could I stress so much about it?

Each time I actually worked the courage to ask him it was like it flew away. It was fucking annoying.

 

The thing is, I didn't know how he would react. I couldn't just tell him he was my soulmate and then ask him on a date!

It would be just horrible, “Hey, Eren I'm your soulmate you know the most important person in your life and yeah I hid it from you for all this time. Of course Hanji knew it. Ho yeah, and all these test was to see why you didn't saw the color when I was touching you. By the way, would you want to go on a date?” There were no way it could end well.

 

Then if I ask him on a date he first has to agree. I mean, he doesn't know I'm his mate so why would he go on a date with me in the first place? If he said yes it would imply that he actually likes my company, which I was positive he, did considering he spent all his lunch time with me. But then, how would a date go?

“Do you like your herbal tea? Yeah? Ho, by the way, I brought you here to tell you I was your mate. Ha yeah, also you can't see the color when I touch you, that's why Hanji did all these experiment. Could you pass me the sugar?” Again really, really bad scenario.

 

When he left the room today, I knew he was angry, but I just couldn't bring myself to ask him.

 

I'll definitely ask him out tomorrow.

 

 

**Eren's POV**

 

 

When I got to Moblit’s lab he wasn't here, which was nothing unusual, really. Sometimes he would have meetings he needed to attend and leave my work on his desktop.

I went to his desk and noticed that there was, oddly enough, no work for me. Instead some IRM photos were scattered on the desk with different test results.

Now, I was sure I wasn't supposed to look at them but something caught my attention. One of the papers had my name written on it. When I looked more closely I noticed that all these were my test results and IRMs.

I sat at Moblit’s desk and went through the documents, trying to figure out what exactly was in them.

I noticed that there was nothing about my heterochromia, but instead lots of information about cone cells and Parvocellular cells and such. All of them were related to the perception of color in general, and had nothing to do with my iris mutation.

It bothered me. Why did they do all these test? Had they lied to me about the reason behind them? Had they been searching for something else?

 

I took the files and started to head in direction of Hanji’s lab.

When I arrived there they were alone, actually doing some paper work for once.

 

“What is this about? I thought you were supposed to study my heterochromia, but there is nothing about it here” I tossed the file on their desk. At this point of the day I was done. First Levi and now this.

They looked at the papers before raising their head and look at me.

 

“Where did you find this?” Their voice, usually cheerful was now low and serious.

 

“It was on Moblit’s desk, he was supposed to leave my work there but I found that instead. So? What does it mean? Tell me.” Irritation tainted my voice, I looked straight at them, waiting for answer.

 

“I don't think you want to hear what it mean from me, you know, and you definitely shouldn't look through someone else work” Their voice was a little cold and harsh. Well, at least now I knew I wasn't supposed to have looked through them.

 

“You're the one who did the experiments. Why did you really make those tests? Is there something you're not telling me?” I didn't let them time to answer, confusion and frustration blinding my mind, ”It's about me right? I should be informed, don't you think?” I was getting impatient and Dr. Zoë was getting annoyed.

 

“Eren, I'm telling you, you don't want to know like this. Why don't you go find Levi?” Impatience could be heard in their voice, but I paid no mind to it and continued to demand answers.

 

“What does Levi has to do with anything?” They rubbed their eyes and sighed.

 

“God, I knew this was going to come back and bite at me. Why does he have to be so emotionally constipated?” They muttered while passing their hand trough their hair, “Listen Eren, don't ask questions, just go get Levi. He should be able to explain it better than me” Here, now they were exasperated and angry, it was the first time I saw them like that. Was it this much of a deal? I felt anger rise inside my chest.

 

“I don't want Levi god damn it! I want you to explain to me! That shouldn’t be too hard, right!” My voice boomed, bubbling anger finally coming out.

 

“For god sake Eren” they shouted and jumped out of their chair, “I don't know and I think it should be more appropriate if your actual mate explained that to you,” As soon as the words were uttered they closed their mouth and significantly paled, obvious regret and panic visible in their eyes.

 

_What?_ What did they just say? Levi as my mate?

It shouldn't be possible, I never had the Revelation, let alone while touching him!

Then it hit me. Our first encounter. I fell into his arms, then he asked me something.

 

“ _Can you see it too?”_

 

Was it possible he was talking about colors? How could that happen? I definitely saw nothing.

 

“Listen Eren, I didn't want to be the one telling you, it seems there is something wrong with your eyes and you didn't have the Revelation even though Levi had. I don't know why, he just didn't want to tell you that you were his mate, maybe if you...” I didn't hear the rest of it. Too focused on my own thoughts.

 

He was my mate.

He lied to me.

All this time.

All this time we spent together, during all these moment he hadn’t used even _one_ of the opportunities to tell me I was his mate.

Why?

Did he think it wasn’t important? Was he ashamed of me? Did he think I wasn't worth it? Did he think I wasn’t the right person?

Was he like those kinds of people who, after finding their mate, continued living a normal life and forgot about them?

 

I felt betrayed. I felt furious, hurt, rejected.

 

How could he do that to me?

 

Not sparing a glance to Hanji, I stormed out of the lab and headed straight to Levi's office.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So?  
> Levis and Erens POV, how was that?
> 
> Also I'd like to thank you guys for all you comments on the previous chapter, I really appreciated it, and I'll do my best to continue writing this fic!
> 
> Please, leave a comment, I really like them and they make my day!  
> Thanks for reading!
> 
> My tumblr is [levis-diddly-dong](http://levis-diddly-dong.tumblr.com/), feel free to come and talk to me! I more or less track the tag fic:tosee so yeah...


	21. Stone

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Look who's back after one month of hiatus! Me!  
> I have no excuse except the lack of motivation to write this fic.  
> But I wrote two one shot in the mean time! So if you guys want you can check it out! (They are fun I swear)
> 
> Also this fic got 8000+ kudo and 400+ like!!! OMG! Thank you all! You guys are amazing! <3
> 
> Thanks to [gondolinnel](http://gondolinnel.tumblr.com/) for being an awesome beta!
> 
> Ho boy here we go

I stormed  through the stair and made my way to the lift.

I was fuming.

I still didn't understand how he could have done that.

What could possibly make him keep it a secret from me? Wait it wasn't even a secret at this point. Hanji knew, I found the files on Moblit's desk to that mean he knew too. Erwin probably knew too so there is a chance that Mike knew too.

Did Armin know too? Had he lied to me too? Was everyone against me in this?

 

Had Levi thought that this wasn't important to me? Did he think that I wasn't worth it? Did he really hate me that much? Was I just a tool their experiment? Didn't he know I have feelings too?

Ha, feelings, and here I had thought that I liked him. Here I’d thought we could have had a chance. I had hoped so much, even thought I knew that dating someone other than your mate would be hard. I thought we had had something, despite that. All the time we’d spent together. All those little jokes we’d shared, those little wars with each other.

Didn't any of that matter? Was it all bullshit?

 

I felt bad, I felt betrayed. He knew how much I hated when people lied to me. Yet he lied. He didn't even seem to feel bad about it. I thought I’d gotten to know him these  month . I thought he’d finally let me in, even if it was just little.

Was it all an Act?

 

I liked him, I liked his little quirks and habits.

Could I possibly forgive him? How will he react? Will he deny that he 's able to see colors ? Will he apologize? Will he even care?

I could forgive him. I knew that deep down. But right now I just wanted an explanation.

I wanted him to explain why he hadn’t told me that I was his mate, why he’d thought that it wasn't worth mentioning  these past month . I wanted him to feel bad. Even a just little. I wanted him to know how I felt, how he had hurt me. He will surely have a hard time regaining my trust, but it won't be impossible.

All he must do is ask for forgiveness.

 

Before I knew it I was in front of his office. I waited a little by door.

It was now, I needed to hear what he had to say.

I stormed inside, slamming the door against the wall.

Levi looked up, startled. I didn't give him time to process what was happening, I went straight to his desk, slamming my hands on it.

 

“How dare you? How dare you lie to me?” I said in a harsh voice, staring into his eyes. He didn't seem to understand what I was talking about, his cold eyes watching me with perplexity.

 

“Eren, please calm down and explain to me what's going on”, he got up of his desk and came to stand beside me.

He wanted me to calm down? To calm down?

I turned to face him properly, caught his cravat in one hand bringing us closer and put my other hand on his neck.

He was startled by the sudden movement and s quirmed to get out of my grip. I tightened my hand around his neck, bringing him closer. Our noses were nearly touching now.

 

“Can you tell me now, what do you see exactly?” my voice, just a whisper, was shaking with anger, my eyebrows were drawn together. I felt hot, like I was suffocating, my breath coming in short puff like I had had a long run.

 

Now he looked petrified, his eyes wide open like he couldn't believe what was happening.

Our eyes were locked together and despite the fact that we were soulmates, nothing changed for me.

The world was still black and white, still gray. No colors.

 

Was I really  a bad choice ? Did he want a better mate? Not a kid, but a more mature person? Was it the fact that I was a guy? 

Did he really have nothing to say?

 

I felt like a bucket of ice had just been poured over me. The anger just flew away, leaving me empty.

 

I slowly let go of his neck, still watching him. He didn't say a word. Just kept looking at me in bewilderment.

 

It hurt. It hurt so much to be here, with the person I'm supposed to love for the rest of my life when he wouldn't talk to me. He could at last say sorry. Try to explain himself?

 

Levi closed his eyes and took a deep breath.

He didn't open them again.

I felt tears build up in my eyes, but I refused to cry. Please, not now.

 

“Levi, please explain.” My voice was broken, desperate.

The tears finally broke, running down my cheeks. I couldn't hold them in anymore. It was too hard.  Looking at him, eyes closed like he hoped he I wasn't here.

 

When he finally opened his eyes, he looked ashamed, powerless. Like things had gotten out of hand and he didn't know how to fix them.

 

“Why did you lie to me? Am I such a disappointment that you don't want me as your mate? I-I...”, my wobbly voice asked again. I couldn't finish the sentence. I felt my throat tighten. I was trying so hard not to break down in front of him. Not to show him how much I cared. But I'm sure my tears were already giving me away.

Was he going to respond this time? Or keep ignoring me?

 

He slowly opened his mouth to speak, but no sound came out of it. He seemed so hopeless now. I’d never seen him like this.

 

“I-I'm sorry Eren, I don't know what to tell you...” his voiced trailed, a little strangled.

 

He had nothing to tell me. He was sorry that he had nothing to tell me. He wasn't even sorry about lying.

What was that?

Ha yes, the sound of everything shattering around me.

I felt so empty now.

A part of me had hoped that he would fight a little, try to make me forgive him. Try to say that he intended to tell me but was just waiting for the right opportunity. That he liked me. That I was a good match for him, that he was more than pleased that I was his mate. That I was worth fighting for. That it was his fault and that he’d fucked up.

 

But no, he had nothing to say to me.

The tears kept running down my face. I couldn't take it anymore, I needed to get out. I needed to get away from him. I turned around, ready to leave the room.

Just before I left, I looked at him one last time.

 

He looked broken too, maybe I was wrong? Maybe he will say something? I wanted to believe in that thought. I wanted to believe in him.

But he didn't say a word. Just kept staring at me, staying still. After some time he avoided my eyes and looked down.

 

I left the room.

It was over.

How could your soulmate just not acknowledge you? Just ignore you and your feelings? Just be sorry to have nothing to say, to have no excuse.

I started running down the hall without even noticing it. I needed fresh air. I needed to get out if this building. To be far away from him and all that reminded me of him.

To forget all the good times we’d had together, all the happy memories.

When I finally got outside, I took a deep ragged breath. I wasn't crying anymore. And I realized there was nothing to cry over. There was literally nothing.

 

Nothing between us. Nothing to hope for.

 

I crouched down in the middle of the sidewalk, my head in my hands.

 

I always thought that I would find my soulmate like they do in romantic movies.

You know, like, we’d be in a café and bump into each other;  or I  would  trip down the street and he would take me in his arm, preventing me from falling;  maybe  we’d be on the beach and our gazes would lo c k up and we  would  just sta re at each other before touching, the magnificent view of the sea illuminating us;  or the never old ' we’ re in college together and just happen to have the same class ' .

 

I never thought it would happen like this. I wasn't the kind of person who’d search desperately for their mate. I always thought it would happen one way or another.

But I never imagined it being this disastrous, never imagined I wouldn't be wanted by my mate.

 

My mom always told me that finding your mate was the most beautiful experience one could have.

I missed her now. She was always here to comfort me, telling me to be strong and not to let it pull me down. I guess I needed to take this advice now too.

I was stronger than this. I needed to be stronger than this. I needed to forget about him and what had happen.

 

I slowly got up. I needed space right now, I needed somewhere to move on to, in order to feel complete again. To fill the hole he left here.

And I knew where I was going.

 

To the sea.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Levi think he screwed up big time.  
> And Eren goes on a road trip, huhuhu, stay tuned, some interesting revelation might occur...
> 
> And in this moment I realized I can't write angst for shit.  
> I don't like this chapter tbh, i don't know. I just don't like how I wrote it i guess.  
> (I listened to Daniel In The Den by Bastille to be in the mood, ho god, this song istg)
> 
> Please, leave a comment, I really like them and they make my day!  
> Thanks for reading!
> 
> My tumblr is [levis-diddly-dong](http://levis-diddly-dong.tumblr.com/), come and talk to me!  
> I track the tag "fic:tosee" there!


	22. Cream

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Here I am again!  
> One month later! I'm really sorry!  
> Things have been a little hard between me an To See but we're trying our best!
> 
> Thanks to [gondolinnel](http://gondolinnel.tumblr.com/) for being an awesome beta and not giving up on my sorry ass!
> 
> Enjoy!

I didn't know for how long I was driving.

The only thing I knew was that I was going to the sea, because it was one of the places I liked the more in the world, a place filled with happy memories.

 

_What will I do there? Who knows?_

 

Maybe I'll find some peace of mind? Maybe I’ll forget everything? Maybe I will forgive him?

I didn't know. And for now I didn't want to think about it.

I focused my attention on driving, watching the scenery pass before me without really paying attention.

It was as though I was on autopilot. I was doing things without really thinking and by the time I was done I didn't even remember doing it. It was relieving in a sense. Not thinking about anything, to just keep going like a robot, feeling kind of numb and empty.

In a part of my mind I knew that it was dangerous; that this automatic mode could cost me my life. That just a little thing, a little bump on the road which could normally be easily avoided, could transform into a fatal mistake.

But right now I didn't care.

And it felt good.

 

Before I knew it I had stopped in a parking lot, and the beach stretched before me. I got out of my car.

It was a sunny day although not very hot due to the cold wind.

I went down the path leading to the beach, sand entering my shoes.

 _Gross_.

I took them off as well as my socks, leaving my feet bare.

There was nothing like being bare foot in the sand. The pleasant feeling of warmth under your feet, the feeling of sinking slightly as you walk, the sand trickling between my toes. It was wonderful.

 

It made me think of the first time I went to the beach. I was with Armin, we were ten and happy back then.

He’d always carry these books about the sea and its wonders with him, and loved to talk to me about it. I wasn’t very interested in it at first. But the more he talked about it, the more I wanted to see it for real.

He was so passionate when he was talking about it, you could see how much he enjoyed learning about the ocean, the creatures that lived there, as well as the historical events that had taken place on the sea!

He knew them all. And I was always here, listening to him and watching the images in his books.

Armin was one of these people that no matter what they were talking about, they made it interesting.

He could be talking about the most boring stuff on earth and you would still be listening.

We were so engrossed with the sea that one day my parents took us on a trip without telling us where we were going. The excitement I felt when I saw the sea for the first time – I could never forget it. I remember the feeling of the salty wind in my hair, the sound of the waves, and this huge mass of water spread out before me. I was speechless.

I took Armin's hand as we ran toward the water. My intention was to stop just before getting soaked, but well, let’s say I underestimated the damp sand. When I wanted to stop myself I was already falling into the water, and Armin with me. It was damn cold, god, it was freezing. And so salty! I didn't know it could be this salty!

But we didn't care; we laughed, and played in the water, our clothes still on us.

All was great back then. My mom was still alive, dad was still here, Mikasa's parent weren't dead.

I didn't have to worry about my soulmate rejecting me.

 

I approached the water, careful not to get myself wet and sat down on the dry sand. I was all alone on the beach; except for the few people I saw far away taking a walk.

I looked at the sea, at the waves crashing with the sand and rocks in front of me.

I thought of what had happened with Levi.

 

He hadn’t said a thing. And I thought that was because he didn't have anything to say, because he didn't like me.

Hah. The thing about me is that I'm quick to anger. If there is one thing that make me insecure, or that makes me mad, I just blow. I don't listen to people and start assuming things on my own.

Was it what I did?

I remembered his broken expresion when I last talked to him. Yeah, he seemed broken and exasperated. Like he didn't know what to do anymore.

Maybe Levi hadn’t said a thing was because I had taken him by surprise, because the things that I had said to him were wrong and he didn't know how to respond to them. Fuck, was it my fault? Had I jumped to a conclusion and believed things that weren't actually true?

I knew I couldn't be all wrong, it was not entirely my fault. First of all, Levi _did_ lie to me, but then, maybe he had reasons to? Maybe he had planned to tell me at some point?

Yeah, but does 'at some point' mean? In one week, two month? In five years when I’ve found someone that I actually like?

Maybe I should give him more credit. He was my mate after all, and he hadn’t been to mean with me all this time. We had had our good moment. Eating together had been nice. A few times, I’d even thought that he might like me.

Ha! How could he like me? Surely all the nice things he’d done were just to keep me at Recon Corps, to buy more time for Hanji so that they could do those tests on me!

But what if the test where the reason he didn't say a thing about being my mate? What if something was really wrong with me? Maybe he tried not to hurt me? I couldn't see the colors after all.

But what could possibly be so awful that he wouldn't tell me anything. That nobody would tell me a damn thing?

 

I was getting nowhere with these thoughts. Maybe I should stop thinking about it for now.

 _Maybe I'll feel better about it if I just stop thinking about him_.

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Alright, I don't like this chapter for some reason. I hope I get to love them in the future or it will pose some problem.  
> What did you guys thought of it?
> 
> Leave a comment, I really like them and they make my day!  
> Thanks for reading!
> 
> My tumblr is [levis-diddly-dong](http://levis-diddly-dong.tumblr.com/), come and talk to me!  
> I track the tag "fic:tosee" there!


	23. Dove

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Well, well, well. Would you look at that! A new chapter and not after one month!  
> The reason? Finals are coming and as you can see I'm procrastinating!  
> That being said, my finals end the 19 march, so update might be low from here until then, sorry!
> 
> Beta credit to [gondolinnel](http://gondolinnel.com/)!
> 
> Enjoy!

I was still on the beach by the time the sun was lowering toward the horizon.

I must’ve been there for nearly 3 hours now, yet I still didn't want to go home. I didn't want to go back there. I'd have to face all this commotion, and I wasn't ready for that yet.

Sure enough, if I checked my phone which I’d left in my car, I would have several calls from Armin and maybe even from Levi.

But who was I kidding, it'd been a while since I’d seen Armin and Levi probably wasn't worried about me.

I should stop this self-pitying, it wasn't doing me any good.

But how could I? How could I when I was feeling so abandoned? I couldn't talk to Armin, he would most likely tell me I had overreacted and that I should apologize to Levi, that maybe he had some reason not to tell me we were soulmates. And he would probably be right, but that's wasn't what I wanted to hear right now.

If I called Mikasa she would tell me how stupid I was for jumping to conclusions too, but not without promising to punch Levi in the face for putting me in this state.

Was there anyone else I could talk to?

Dr. Zoë had lied alongside with Levi, so I couldn't ask them shit.

Most people would probably turn to their parents in this situation, but when you parents are dead it's kind of a hard thing to do.

I wished they were still alive, or at last that my mom was still alive and my dad not missing.

God damn it, what was he doing? Where had he been all this time? Why would he leave his kids when they needed him the most?

Was everyone around me going to leave me? Was I not good enough? First my dad, then Armin and Mikasa, going on with their lives, and now Levi.

I couldn't take it anymore, I needed someone to be here for me, someone I could talk to about all my insecurities, about all the things that were pulling me down. About my mom, about how I felt about my dad. Someone I could rely on and who wouldn't let me down.

For some time I had thought that maybe Levi could be that person, well obviously I’d been wrong.

I’d been so very wrong.

Or had I, really?

 

I gazed at the sea in front of me. The sun was reflecting on it, I could see a light grey shade where it was shining..

I was sitting on the sand, not caring about the sand slipping into my pants. Sure, it would be a hell to get rid of, but right now I didn't care.

Some say that the sunset on the sea is one of the most beautiful things in the world of colors. There was nothing beautiful about this sunset though.

The sea was dark, almost black, the sun casted a pale grey shine on it.

It was getting darker and darker and the wind started to blow harder.

The atmosphere matched my mood perfectly. It was lonely and depressing.

 

I didn't want to move, I was fine right there.

The wind blew and a cold shiver ran down my spine. I hadn't realized how cold I was till now. I’d been too entranced in my own thoughts.

I was so lost in thought that I hadn't heard the people coming close to me, I only noticed them when one of them spoke up.

 

“Beautiful isn't it? The view here is breathtaking”, I looked up from where I was sitting to see a big guy looking at the sea. He seems to be tall from where I was and was definitely buff. He was built like those American football players. He had a square face and in the dark light his hair seemed grey. Maybe more white in the sun light.

Behind him were two other people, a little girl with the look of a dead fish and a taller guy who looked like he didn't want to be there at all. He was shivering, from the cold or from stress? I didn't know.

 

“I wouldn't know, I can't see the colors” I got up and stared at him, he was definitely taller and more muscular than me.

He studied my face for some time before looking at the other two.

 

“You've been here for some time now, are you alright?” He asked in a worried tone.

Wow, some stranger actually worried about me. Well that was comforting.

But was I going to tell the truth? What for, these people didn't know me, I didn't know them, we were probably never going to meet again.

But on the other side, maybe getting the point of view of a third party could do me some good, as I didn't want to talk to any of my friend right now.

 

“Haaa, not really, just, you know, mate drama”, I said casting my eyes down.

When I looked up he was smiling, but it wasn't a smile of understanding., it was more of a sorry smile. He didn't seem like the guy that would be swept in “mate drama”.

 

“Ha man that sucks, sorry I never really had mate drama like you say...” He stopped talking for some time, confusion showed on his face. Why would he be confused? “Wait, you told me you couldn't see colors, how could you have mate drama?”

 

Ha, so it as about that.

The other two came closer, wanting to hear what was going on. I noticed that the girl had light grey hair and the tall lanky guy dark one.

 

“Yeah, I know. It's... It's kinda complicated, even I am not sure of what is going on anymore” and that was the truth.

I was so mad at Levi for not telling me about our relationship that I totally forgotten about that one essential thing.

I couldn't see the colors.

And why was that? What was going on? Was Hanji testing this all this time? I was interrupted in my line of thought when beefy guy laughed. It was a booming laugh, one you would expect coming out of a guy from his stature.

 

“Ha, welcome to the weirdo club! See, Annie, Berthold and myself there were born with the ability to see color!” He laugh again, turning himself to laugh with the Annie girl and Berthold guy.

Annie seemed bored, and Berthold casted me an apologetic smile.

Yet they didn't seem amused at all.

 

What was going on?

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I actually really like this chapter, he was really easy to write, and I hope the next one will be too!
> 
> So, what do you guys think is going to happen! What's secret behind the Trio eyes? Will they help Eren figure out what's wrong with his eyes?  
> Some revelation will come in the next chapters! ( I just read that in Varrick voice from LOK haha)
> 
> Leave a comment, I really like them and they make my day!  
> Thanks for reading!
> 
> My tumblr is [levis-diddly-dong](http://levis-diddly-dong.tumblr.com/), come and talk to me!  
> I track the tag "fic:tosee" there!


	24. Announcement

Hey everyone.

As you may have notice this fic hasn't updated in a while. Truth be told, I'm kinda hitting a huge writer block. As much as I love this fic, it's been stressing me out for some time because I stopped writing for it. I don't like when fic aren't updated in a while, so I really feel bad for you guys.  
I'm not pleased with the thing I write anymore, so I'm planning on stopping writing. ~~(For now or forever)~~

So, I sorta give you two solution, either I publish how this fic should have ended and the plot line or you could wait, I don't know how long, till I get my shit together and decide to write again.  
Tell me your choice in the comment.

Either way this fic is on hiatus for now.

And I'm really sorry for that.


	25. Sepia

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> IS ANYONE STILL READING THIS? LMAO
> 
> Well, well, look who finally pulled their head out of their ass! (not completely tho, I'm still halfway up there)
> 
> Also somehow this fanfic got 600 kudos!!!! Thank you all for that, you guys are awesome! Ily!!
> 
> Anyway, here is a real chapter this time!!  
> Thanks to [Sab](http://gondolinnel.tumblr.com/) for the beta work!!

We made our way to their cabin not too far away from the beach.

 

Reiner said it was nice to have a place somewhere near the beach where they could relax and avoid the busy city.

He was leading the way, and was the only one talking. It looked like he was doing anything to avoid the “touchy” subject. Berthold and Annie were walking behind us, in what seems to be their permanent state: Berthold sweating and Annie looking bored as hell.

 

When we finally reached the cabin, Annie opened the door with a key that she had kept in the pocket of her sweater.

The tiny house was cozy, we stepped into a living room with a table and some chairs, on the right side was a couch, a love seat and some cushions facing a TV. I could see a door on the left near the table, probably leading to the rooms and bathroom. At the back of the living room was a small kitchen. Big enough to cook some proper meals but not too big to take too much space. The kitchen wall had large windows and we could see the sea from where we were standing.

 

“Come sit down, I bet you have some questions to ask us” Reiner went to sit on the couch. Annie went to sit beside him and Berthold decided that the floor was better, sitting on a cushion with his head near Reiner’s knees.

The only seat left was the loveseat. I wasn't going to complain.

 

They didn't propose to serve me a drink, nor anything to eat. I figured I wasn't really here because they wanted me to, but rather because they probably needed to talk to someone who wasn't like everyone else. Someone whose eyes were “wrong”.

Like theirs.

 

We were looking at each other, no one initiating a conversation. I decided that if no one was going to start talking I may as well ask the question that had been burning my tongue since I met them.

 

“So, you are telling me that, the three of you, were able to see colors since the day you were born?”

 

“Well, yeah, that's pretty much it” Reiner stated as though it was the most natural thing in the universe.

Which it wasn't. At least not to me.

I had never heard of a case where a baby had been born with the ability to see colors. What was the probability that the three of them would meet?

 

“Are you sure? Maybe, I don't know, you met your soulmate when you were little?”

 

“Nah, I met Bert and Annie when I was 8, and by that time I was already seeing colors”, he said, brushing off my question.

 

“So, you, Berthold and Annie met, and you could all the see the color before that.” They all nodded. “How is that even possible? I mean, I know that having more than one mate is possible, so I know some exceptions do exist, but, how could you _see colors_? And what about soulmates? How will you know when you find ‘the one’?” I had too many questions, and I felt like they didn't have all the answers.

They looked at each other, Berthold decided to speak for the first time.

 

“We, all three of us, are soulmates. You know it's already possible for people to have more than one mate, well that's the case for us.” He was fiddling with his sweater, and Reiner placed his hand on his shoulder, trying to calm him maybe.

 

I couldn't say anything.

 

So these, three people, who had been able to see colors since the day they were born, had also met their soulmates. And, it wasn't one mate, but two!

 

Well, they certainly shouldn't get near Dr. Zoë or she would go batshit crazy.

 

“But, how did you know? Did you have some sort of Revelation?”

Reiner laughed, finding my question amusing for some reason.

 

“Revelation, what a load of bullshit! No, we didn't have the _Revelation_ ” He spat the last word as though they were the most disgusting things in the world.

“Listen, the Revelation forces someone to love another person, even though they might not like each other! Then they stay stuck for the rest of their lives and it's a miserable life, believe me. My parents were like that, and even a child couldn't make them get along.”

 

I thought about the information Levi had told me some time ago, about the discovery the researchers had made.

 

“You know, actually, we just discovered that some chemicals kind of force you to love your mate, but it's true that in some cases, the amount of chemicals is so little that the couple don't get along.”

 

“Yeah! That's what I'm telling you! Why get stuck with someone you don't even like in the name of the ‘Revelation’. This is bullshit. “

 

He was talking faster and faster, his hands making huge gestures as if to prove his point.

 

“We, had the choice. Or more like, we fell in love with each other, without this chemical forcing us to love one another. Human don't need that crap.

We could decide to fall in love with someone and still be happy together. Can the rest of the world say the same? No, they are forced into this relationship whether they want to or not.

And as you may have noticed, this ‘system’ isn't flawless. You can have more than two mates, some people never love their mates, and some never find one. People are born with the ability to see colors, and some will never see them despite finding their mate.” He looked straight at me while saying the last part, I felt shiver run through my body. I was drinking his words, captivated by them.

“Annie here, she would never have been in love with her mate. She doesn't even love us.” The latter turned her head to him, raising an eyebrow.

“Well, I mean, she doesn't love us the way people describe ‘love’. She loves us, just not in a romantic way, and it works for us. I can't explain in her place. But we are happy as we are and we wouldn't change for anything in the world.

Maybe we aren't ‘mates’ and maybe one day we will discover that someone out there is waiting for us. And I will gladly try to love them, but they would have to understand that Revelation or not, I love Berthold and Annie, and I wouldn't be in a relationship without them.

That's our choice, and we wouldn't change it.

“You know, it may seems awesome like that, to be able to see color without having met your mate. But it's not. At least it wasn't when we were younger. Everyone was talking about how they couldn’t wait to meet their mates and see colors when I could already see them. I wondered what was wrong with me, and if I would ever fall in love. My parents told me to never reveal that I could see the colors, because people would think I'm weird. And maybe something is wrong with me, but I don't care anymore, I have found people I love, and that's all that matters to me now.”

 

He stopped talking, determination in his eyes.

 

I was speechless.

 

It felt like I had discovered our world for the first time, under a new light. Questions I would never have thought of popped into my head.

 

Reiner was right, the Revelation was probably a ‘mistake’, forcing people together and making their lives miserable.

 

I thought of these people who never found their mates, and that according to Reiner, they could choose. They could choose or not to fall in love with someone, instead of having this choice taken away from them and be forced in a relationship.

But in our society, where the Revelation was like an Oracle, “getting in the way” of a potential couple wouldn't be seen with a good eye.

 

I looked down at my feet, entranced in my thoughts. What Reiner told me shook what I had always believed in.

That the Revelation predicted our future love lives or lack of.

I had never thought that we could have a choice.

 

I then thought of my situation.

I had a mate, but I couldn't see the colors.

Was that another mistake of the Revelation?

 

I thought of Annie, who apparently didn't have any romantic feelings for anyone.

Would have she been happy if she found her soulmate? Would the chemicals force her to love her mate?

 

So many questions and so few answers. There were a lot of variables, and nothing was simple. The achromatopsia, the chemicals released during the Revelation, our free will to love, the relationships with others - all of that was forming a complex web, one of which I couldn't possibly grasp the entire complexity of.

 

I was aware that we knew little of the Revelation, but I never thought it would be to this extent.

It baffled me.

 

I looked up, ready to ask more questions.

 

The trio was watching expectantly, waiting to hear my opinions on the subject.

 

I opened my mouth to speak, but three knocks on the door interrupted me.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hu hu hu. Who might that be??
> 
> Anyway, I'm getting back to smaller chapter format, I hope that I will write more like that! I might try to update more, I don't know, I kinda have the end more or less...
> 
> Comments and feedback make my life, if you leave one you'll make my day! It can just say "u did gut", just so I know you guys liked it!
> 
> Also, I wrote some one shot during this "hiatus" feel free to check them out!
> 
> My tumblr is [levis-diddly-dong](http://levis-diddly-dong.tumblr.com/) so if you want to yell at me for not updating more feel free to do so!


	26. Ash

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Yoo, only one week after!!  
> I will try (try i say) to update once a week from now on.
> 
> Thanks to [Em](http://i-read-too-many-fanfics.tumblr.com/) for the beta work!

The knocks on the door made our heads turn towards the interrupting noise, stopping me just before words could come out of my mouth.

 

By the looks of it, the trio hadn’t expected anyone tonight, and it couldn’t be a neighbor, as I didn’t see anyone around or any house in the area.

 

Reiner got up to open the door, stopping in front of it before opening a little.

Because this guy was almost as large as the door, and the person behind it didn’t seem that tall, I couldn’t see who it was.

 

I heard Reiner talk to the other person but couldn’t understand what they were saying.

After some time he moved to the side, revealing the person behind the door.

 

There he stood, a little out of breath and cheeks with a hint of blush, I use the word blush loosely here since it technically was only a darker shade of grey than the rest of his face.

 

 

“What the fuck are you doing here?” Were the first words that came out of my mouth, and without knowing it I was standing up to face him.

A swirl of emotion washed over me. I wasn’t ready to see him yet. I wasn’t ready to face him, to ask him questions, let alone ready to get his answers.

 

He seems like he didn’t know what to say. Just standing there, lost and nervous.

 

“I- I was searching for you Eren”, he fidgeted with his coat, looking at everything but me.

 

“And how the fuck did you even find me?” How indeed? The last time I saw him was in his office, which must have been like 4 hours ago!

 

“Hm, you’re phone, the GPS. You should turn it off sometimes”

 

No shit, I should definitely turn it off it would spare me this kind of trouble.

 

“Is there a problem Eren? “ Reiner asked, raising his eyebrow.

 

Was there a problem?

I didn’t know.

 

Obviously Levi came all this way for me. But then what? What did he expect? Me falling into his arms, crying that I was sorry I left like that? A warm welcome?

Hell no.

 

“No it’s fine, he’s my… mate” Levi looked up when I said the last word not believing that I said that. I myself didn’t believe that I had just said that, even though it felt bitter on my tongue.

 

God, what a mess.

 

And this mess had to be taken care of.

I couldn’t stay all my life running away from it even though the idea was really appealing to me.

I had to move my ass.

 

Sighing I turned to Berthold and Annie,

“Hey guys, thank you for everything. I think I need to go now.” Berthold and Annie nodded, and I made my way to the door.

 

“Alright, it was nice meeting you Eren, feel free to pass by when you have time! I think we still have a lot of thing to say to each other!” Just before closing the door Reiner patted me on my back, and I seriously thought that he would break my spine.

 

 

And then here we were.

Levi and I looking into each other’s eyes without saying anything.

 

“Let’s go.” He said before turning to the beach, walking towards the parking lot.

 

He didn’t even wait for me.

 

I caught up to him, but stayed a little behind him.

 

We were walking in silence, the only sounds were the waves crashing on the sand accompanying us.

The sun had been set for some time now, the sea now tainted black.

 

I looked up and stopped.

 

We could see the stars shining in the dark night sky. It was amazing, you could never look up and see this many stars in the city.

I noticed that Levi had stopped too, observing me.

 

“Eren listen, I want-“

 

“I don’t want to talk right now Levi.” I said looking at him sternly. “I- I just need time to figure things out, then we can talk. But right now it’s not what I need, I don’t want to talk”

 

“Okay.” He didn’t say anything after that, just kept looking at me.

 

I sighed, feeling all the weight of this day on my shoulders. I was suddenly tired and only wanted to sleep. Sleep would probably solve everything.

At least I hoped so.

 

“I don’t want to go back.” I murmured

 

“What?” He asked.

 

“I said I don’t want to go back.” I repeated my voice louder.

And I knew where I wanted to go.

“Just follow me in your car.”

 

I sprinted to my car, not bothering to check if he was following me.

My turn to not wait for him.

 

I got into my car, trying to calm my beating heart.

 

I had to prepare myself to where we were going. It wasn’t going to be this easy.

 

Once I assured myself that Levi got into his car I started mine, exiting the parking lot.

 

The few scattered lamps on the road didn’t do much to help me drive. I focused my thought on the road, not wanting any invading thoughts on other present matters.

Like where we were going, or my soulmate following me in his car and all the questions I wanted to ask him.

 

After losing myself a little on the road, we finally reached our destination.

 

I got out of the car and looked at the house in front of me. Levi rejoined after parking his car, and looked at the house too, standing beside me.

 

It was a two-story house, the paint once white now a dark shade of grey in the night. Weeds had taken over the garden in the front once full of flowers and vegetables. Ivy was climbing on the wall blocking some of the windows.

 

“It’s my old house.” I whispered.

Actually it was still my house. After me mom died and my father disappeared Mikasa and I moved to the city, not wanting to stay longer in this house.

 

“It must have been really pretty.” Levi said calmly.

 

“It was.” I agreed, and for the first time this night, I smiled at him.

He smiled back, though it was unsure smile, like he didn’t know how to act with me anymore.

 

I went to the door, and opened it.

I always had the key with me on my key ring, blame it on my emotional ass.

 

The inside was dark, and when I tried to turn on the light nothing happened. Electricity must have been cut, as well as water.

The air was dusty, making me sneeze each time I breathed.

The atmosphere felt nostalgic and welcoming.

 

I avoided the living room; the dark smudge on the wooden floor felt like it was mocking my cowardice and me in general.

 

“You can take Mikasa old room if you want, it’s upstairs just beside mine.”

 

I climbed the stairs with Levi following closely behind me.

He hadn’t said anything since we entered the house, and I was grateful for that.

I was calmer now, but still not ready to talk yet.

 

“Be sure to open the window a little to make the dust go away though, there should be clean sheets in the dresser.” I stopped in front of my old room.

 

Levi opened the door beside mine, took a glance before turning to me.

 

“Tomorrow we talk.” He stated before entering and closing the door.

It wasn’t even a question. We’ll talk tomorrow and I better be ready for it.

 

Sighing, I opened the door of my old room.

 

It was like a flow of memories hit me in the face. Some happy and some less, but overall it was nice.

I smiled to myself, and went to open the window.

After struggling to open it, I figured that the ivy plant was probably in the way of it, thus making impossible to open it.

Too bad.

 

I crashed on my old bed, not bothering to change the sheet.

I was too damn tired.

 

I closed my eyes, telling myself that I probably should take off my shoes, but before I knew it I was asleep.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Kinda a lame development I'm sorry.  
> I wanted to post it last night but due to the circumstance I preferred not to. I'm doing it today so my notes just after will correspond with the event.
> 
> So, side note.  
> As some of you may now I'm French and today all my thought goes the the family and victim of the attack in Paris. Yesterday was a dark day for France, it was the first time since WWII that we had so many death in one day (130 at least in the city). The border are closed for now and the President declared the emergency state.  
> We should stay united in the dark time, and even though ISIS claimed the attack, we shouldn't forget that they aren't representative of Muslim. My thought also go to French Muslim who will be pointed at when it had nothing to do with them.  
> Now something that annoyed me very much (and this is an understatement), is an ereri fic that was published this morning about the attack in Paris. And this pissed me very much. Not even 8 hours after the event and the author thought the attack would be a great idea for a plot. It's not. People died, it was awful.  
> Please don't romanticize the attack, there is nothing beautiful and romantic about it. (A parallel to show how inappropriate this is would be 9/11, no one would fucking do a romantic fanfic about it, so please don't do it)
> 
> #PrayforParis
> 
> my tumblr [levis-diddly-dong](http://levis-diddly-dong.tumblr.com/)


	27. Smoke

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Yooo!!  
> New, chapter!!  
> A little longer that the two previous one!  
> Now they talk!!
> 
> Thanks to [Sab for the beta work!!](http://gondolinnel.tumblr.com/)

I woke up with the taste of dust in my mouth.  
 _No shit._  
What did I expect, after sleeping in that dusty room without even opening the window beforehand?  
  
I turned my bed, face down in the pillow.  
I felt rested.  
It was a good thing considering the conversation I was going to have today.  
I grunted, and stretched.  
My stomach made an angry sound, reminding me that I hadn’t eaten in a long time.  
I searched for my phone that must have fallen out of my pocket while I was asleep, and picked it up. The battery was dead. I sighed.  
  
I sat on my bed, and much to my surprise I smelled food.  
Did Levi cook?  
How? Gas was cut as well as the water after all.   
  
I got up and made my way downstairs.  
  
Levi was in the kitchen, a bag from some bakery on the table.  
 So that was what smelled so good.  
  
“I went ahead and grabbed some breakfast, I didn’t know that there was a small town nearby”  
  
“Oh yes, the house is a little isolated I guess, my parents loved the silence of it”, I scratched my head. I didn’t know what else to say, it was definitely a little awkward.  
  
“Let’s go sit in the living room, we can eat in there” Levi said grabbing the bag.  
  
“NO!” I bolted, blocking his way. He looked startled and stopped in his tracks. “I mean, I’d rather eat here” I hurriedly added. He raised an eyebrow, skeptical.  
“Please” I pleaded.  
He threw one last glance behind me at the living room, before turning around and sitting at the kitchen table.  
  
I silently sighed, and went to sit too.  
The living room was a complete no-no. Shiver ran trough my spine and I tried to get rid of the uncomfortable feeling.  
  
Levi got the food out of the bag; a coffee for him (with side cream and at least three sugar cubes) and tea for me.  
  
“They didn’t have infusion, only cheap tea, sorry” He handed me a cup.  
  
“Oh, it’s okay, it’s still better than coffee” I was surprised that he remembered that I didn’t like coffee or tea. Tea was still better than coffee though.  
  
He got some croissants and chocolate croissants out of the bag too.  
We started to eat in silence, neither of us saying a word.  
I for one didn’t know what to say, maybe Levi was just waiting for me to speak, but I really didn’t know what to say.  
Most probably he was waiting for us to finish breakfast before starting to talk.  
So we ate breakfast in silence.  
And as much as I had thought that I would be ready for the talk this morning, I was dreading it now. My stomach felt tense, and I could barely eat.  
  
Levi finished before me and fiddled on his phone waiting for me to finish.  
His phone rang and he frowned.  
He murmured a small “sorry” before standing up and going upstairs to answer it.  
  
I could hear his voice upstairs but couldn’t make out any words.  
I managed to finish my breakfast, and tried to relax.  
I closed my eyes, trying to calm myself. I didn’t notice that Levi had stopped talking; I heard his footstep in the stairs and composed myself.  
  
Levi sat back in the chair, and looked at me.  
I looked at him.  
  
Well, this seems promising.  
  
“So, I think I owe you some explanation” Levi started.   
I raised my eyebrows.  
 _No. Shit._  
  
Seeing me “No shit” face Levi sighed.  
  
“I’ll answer all of your question truthfully”.  
And that was it.  
It was my turn.  
And I had waited for this moment, but now, I couldn’t think of anything.  
Or more like there were so many things to think about that my head was empty.  
So many questions, some of which I didn’t want to know the answer.  
  
“The fuck Levi?” is what came out first.  
Of all things I had to say. _Way to go Eren._  
But then again, I guess it was justified.  
“I mean, are we… Are we soulmates? For real?”   
Now we were getting somewhere.  
  
“Yeah. Yes we are”, He calmly said. Like it was the most natural thing on earth.  
It wasn’t!   
Not that I had counted, but I couldn’t remember ever seeing colors when I touched him!  
  
“How? How is it even possible? I don’t see colors! And why didn’t you tell me!?” My voice was rising, and I was practically screaming at the end.  
There went my composure.  
  
Levi looked down on his hands.  
  
“It was when I first met you. I don’t know if you remember but you fainted. I caught you and touched you. And yeah, that’s how I learnt that we were mates” He was still looking down, his voice was low and slow.   
  
“And why didn’t you tell me?”  
  
“I-I don’t know. I asked if you could see it too, and it didn’t seem like you understood. I thought that- I don’t know what I thought. It was so sudden, I wasn’t expecting it. I don’t have a valid excuse.” He had looked up, his eyes filled with apology.  
I could understand that he didn’t say anything right away.  
But we spent more time together after. He had had ton of opportunities to tell me.  
  
“Then, after the first chock, why didn’t you tell me?”  
  
“I never really wanted a mate. I mean, after all I’m 28, I thought I’d never find mine and I was ok with this idea. Then suddenly I find myself with a mate younger than me.” He stopped.  
“And there is also the experiment too”  
  
“Oh yes, I’d very much like to hear about that too. It wasn’t about my heterochromia was it?”  
  
“No. Hanji wanted to know why you hadn’t had the Revelation and why you wouldn’t see the colors whenever I touched you. She remembered that you father had conducted some experiment on somebody and the case seemed similar. She thought it might have been you, but even now we still don’t know what is wrong with your eyes.”  
  
“So basically, you didn’t want a soulmate and was stuck with me, lied to me about the experiments and never planned to tell me you were my mate” My voice was harsh, and I was getting more and more angry. What kind of lame ass excuses was that?  
  
“No, actually I planned to tell you the day you found out. You were just quicker to find out, I swear Eren, I wanted to tell you”  
  
“Okay” I sighed and closed my eyes.  
I was still angry. But knowing the truth definitely made me feel better.  
  
“I can’t forgive you yet.” I finally said.  
  
“It’s okay, I understand. I don’t expect you to forgive after all I did”.  
  
 _Ah, the fucker. If only he knew._  
Sure I was angry.  
But there was no point trying to kid myself.  
I liked Levi.  
I liked so many things about him. Even if the lie tinted my feelings for him, I hoped that we could get back like we were.  
And who knows? Maybe start a relationship.  
  
“Do you want to try?” Levi asked, pulling me out of my thoughts.  
  
“Try what?”  
  
“Holding hands” he said, holding out his hand over the table. “Maybe you’ll be able to see something if you are aware that you have a mate”, I looked at his extended hand.  
Slowly mine came closer to his before grasping it.  
  
I waited.  
  
Nothing.  
  
Slowly, I retired my hand, shaking my head.  
  
“Still the same, all in black and white” I was a little disappointed to say the last.  
I had hoped that maybe, something would have changed.  
“Ahah, isn’t it a little pathetic though? You’re stuck with a mate that can’t see the colors and that you don’t even like” I said humorless.  
  
“No, Eren. Actually I-I li-“  
  
“Shhhh” I interrupted him. Levi raised an eyebrow, looking offended.  
  
“Are you shushing me? Now? Don’t you dare to shu-“  
  
“SHHHHH!” I reiterated louder. “Can you hear that?”  
He closed his mouth, and listened.  
I turned my head to the door, trying to hear the sound I heard earlier again.  
  
Nothing.  
  
“Are you sure it wasn’t the wind?” Levi asked, but my glare made him shut up for good this time.  
  
I waited more, trying to hear that sound.  
  
Nothing.  
  
Then I heard it again. Faint, but it was here.  
  
“It comes from upstairs” I said, getting up and making my way upstairs.  
I heard Levi follow me.  
  
I stopped at the top of the stairs, trying to detect the source of the sound.  
  
“I think I heard it, it came for the last door on the left” Levi said.  
  
The last door on the left.  
My parents’ room.  
  
The door was slightly ajar and we entered the room silently, waiting for the sound again.  
  
The light poured into the room from the window, dust slowly drifting in the light.  
The bed was made; nothing was out of place on the desk. The big wardrobe door on our left was slightly open but apart from that everything seemed normal.  
  
We waited again, expecting some sound.  
  
After some time I gave up. Maybe it wasn’t in this room.  
  
“It must have been elsewhere, let’s go” I was starting to turn when Levi grabbed my arm and pointed at the wardrobe.  
  
I slowly turned to look at it.  
  
I heard the sound again, it was like a little shriek. Pitched and strident.  
The wardrobe door moved a little.  
  
Slowly, I walked toward it. I heard the sound again.  
I grabbed the door before jerking it open.  
  
Nothing inside except mom’s old dresses and coats.  
I sighed.   
  
“So?” Levi asked. He was behind me and couldn’t see the inside.  
  
I was going to say “Nothing” when I casted my eyes down.  
  
There.  
On the wardrobe floor.  
There was the source of the sound.  
I picked it up before turning to Levi.  
  
“Look Levi it was a kitten!” In my arms, a kitten.  
He was grey almost white, with the tip of his ears, his paws and his tail black.  
He meowed when I tried to pet him and bit my hand.  
Surprised I dropped him and he climbed back in the wardrobe.  
  
“For fuck sake Eren be careful” Levi said.  
  
“It bit me!” I crouched down, trying to find him in the wardrobe.  
But impossible to find him. It was like he had disappeared.  
I got up and pushed aside my mom’s clothes to make some space.  
  
And there, behind the clothes, in the back of the wardrobe.  
  
A hidden door.   
  
“What kind of Narnia shit is that?” I heard Levi ask behind me.  
  
 _Indeed._  
  
What kind of Narnia shit was that.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Huhuhuh! What was Levi going to say before Eren shushed him?
> 
> And yay!! Kitten!
> 
> And yay! Hidden door!
> 
>  
> 
> Comments and feedback make my life, if you leave one you'll make my day! It can just say "u did gut", just so I know you guys liked it!
> 
> My tumblr is [levis-diddly-dong](http://levis-diddly-dong.tumblr.com/)!


	28. Jet Black

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> We learn what is in the secret door!!
> 
> Thanks to [gondolinnel](http://gondolinnel.tumblr.com/) for the Beta work!!

“Levi, what the fuck, there is a secret door in my parent’s closet”

“I can see that Eren!” He stood right beside me, peeking into the closet.  
“Did you know about this?” He asked.

“Levi look at my face! Does it seem like I knew?” I said, my eyes wide.

How the fuck would I have known?  
Did Mikasa know?  
What was in there?

I pushed my mom’s clothes aside, climbing into the closet.

“Are you really going in there?” Levi held me back by my shirt.

“Yes Levi! There is a kitten in there! Imagine what else there could be!” I got out of his grasp and started pushing the door.

“WAIT!” He shouted.  
I turned around.  
“Aren’t you afraid to like, find your parents’ weird sex dungeon?”

I stopped to look at him.  
Really look at him.

What the fuck.

“No! What the fuck Levi” He backed away a little, hands in his hair in an appeasing gesture.

I turned again, and this time the door pushed open.

“I’m just saying! Don’t blame me if you end up traumatized or something” I heard him say behind me. I rolled my eyes.  
Hard.

For real, the last thing I expected was to find some weird dungeon here.

I heard the kitten meow from the inside of the closet and went into the room.

It wasn’t a dungeon.

In a part of my head I thanked my parent for having a vanilla sex life.

Levi slipped in the room too, just behind me.  
What we entered was actually a small office.

There were no windows in the room, the walls were a color between white and light gray. An old couch was on the left, and an old secretary desk was against the wall in front of us.

It was a wooden secretary desk, with delicate gold ornaments. The kind you could find in museums or at rich people’s places.  
I had no idea we had that.  
It smelled musty inside, but it wasn’t very surprising.  
The whole house smelled musty.

I approached the secretary desk.  
It as closed.  
The surface was smooth though dusty, my finger lefts traces on it.

“I found the kitten” I heard Levi say on my left.  
“He was hiding behind the couch”

I turned and saw Levi with the kitten in his hands.  
He was petting him and the kitten didn’t bite him nor tried to get away. How? The little shit bit me!

I turned back to the secretary desk.

“Can you open it?” He asked.  
I tried to, but it was definitely locked.

“No, there must be a key though, there is a key hole. My dad must have it” What was inside must be locked away and hidden behind a secret door.  
What did my dad wanted to hide?

“Hm” He stood beside me, observing it.  
“It must be an old key then, this secretary desk is old. Did you ever see your dad with a key like that?”

An old key.  
An old key my father had.

I touched the one under my clothes, the one hanging around my neck.

It couldn’t be.

I quickly got it out and stared at it.

“An old key like this?” I turned to him, the key in hand.  
Levi nodded, the cat still in his hands.

I inserted the key in the key hole and tried to turn.

It clicked.

The secretary desk opened itself.

Slowly I lowered the wooden panel which was locking it.  
What was inside was an old laptop, scattered papers, and a journal.

“It must be the research your father did. We’ve been looking all over for them!” Levi shifted the kitten to only one hand and took the journal.  
He skimmed trough it before handing it to me.

“It’s your father’s, you should be the one to read it”

Hesitantly, I took it in my hands.  
I didn’t know what to expect.

As a student studying the physiology of the eyes I was exited.  
As the son he abandoned, I wasn’t.

“I’ll leave you alone, I’m going to find something to feed the cat” And he left.

I was thankful for that.  
I needed some time alone.

What if I learned something I didn’t want to?  
What if he’d done some horrible experiment?  
What would I do after with the research?  
Would I hand it over to Recon Corp?

I went to sit on the couch and started to read.

I needed to know.

There were so many things we didn’t know about the Revelation.  
I couldn’t not read it just because of some hard feelings.

The first pages were about his early research.  
Nothing new that we didn’t already know now.

What was a surprise though was that I learned the name of his laboratory partners.

Miyuki and Daniel Ackerman.

Mikasa’s parents.

So that must be why he took her in when her parents died.  
I’d known they’d been friends, but I hadn’t known they’d worked together.

I continued to read, thinking that I would tell Mikasa about what I’d discovered.

Maybe Armin too. If he wasn’t so busy with his mates and his internship.

I had to tell them that Levi was my mate, too!  
So many things I had to tell them.  
So many things had happened in such a short period of time.

I continued to read.  
Some passages in the journal weren’t about his research but about his life.

Like, my birth.  
I could sense that he was truly happy about it. The way he described what names they had planned, the small and big fits my mom used to throw for nothing, how they’d planned to paint my room and everything.

What made him change this much?

I kept reading, immerged in the journal, I didn’t see Levi come up and check on me.

Then I came across it.  
This particular part that made me throw the journal away, screaming “Fucker!” at it.

“What is it?” I heard Levi say.

I couldn’t answer.  
My eyes were fixed on the journal that was thrown across the room.

Levi picked it up, reading the page on which it had landed.

  
_“Today I spent some time with Eren. His eyes are the most beautiful things ever. His eyes have a warm amber color like his mother’s. It’s a light brown, honey and gold at the same time._  
_At the age of 3 Eren is full of life. He’s a real talking machine, we can’t stop him. The few hours we had to ourselves with Carla was when he was asleep or watching the TV, but even then, he couldn’t stop himself from shouting to the TV._  
_Now back to today, as we were outside, Eren pointed at the sky and asked me what it was. When I replied that it was the sky, we kept asking me why it was so “shiny”._  
_As I imagined that it looked grey to him, I didn’t understand why he would describe it as shinny. I explained that the sun produces a lot of light, and that that was why the sky was so shiny. He didn’t seems to like this answer and pouted for some time._  
_After looking at the sky again, he turned to me saying “It’s shiny blue like in the book with the water!”._  
_The use of the word blue is what surprised me. When I asked him to explain how it was like the see, to my surprise Eren told me that the sea was blue like the sky, but that there wasn’t this yellow ball in the see._  
_Today I learned that my son could see the colors._  
_As I write I’m confused and greatly concerned._  
_If they get their hands on him who knows what they will do to him._  
_That’s why I’ve decided myself, to try to “fix” him._  
_I will try to make my son achromatic like the rest of population that hasn’t found their soulmate._  
_As I came to this conclusion, it wrecked my heart. I hope that he will never come to know this. He is still too young to remember that, if I take action quickly he won’t remember ever seeing colors._  
_I hope Carla understands, but with the threat of them on our head we have no choice._  
_I’m sure Dan will help me. With him it will be dealt with in no time.”_

How could he do that to me?

How dare my own father do something like this?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sooo! What do you think?  
> Did you expect that?  
> Did you not?  
> What do you think of Grisha now?  
> Would a sex dungeon have been better?  
> Maybe I should have put this secret room in the basement ahah!
> 
> Comments and feedback make my life, if you leave one you'll make my day! It can just say "u did gut", just so I know you guys liked it!
> 
> My tumblr is [levis-diddly-dong](http://levis-diddly-dong.tumblr.com/)!


	29. Salt

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Yoooo guess who's back!  
> For a little while...
> 
> I'm sorry I'm not updating this guys, i really try to find motivation to continue but it's not always easy...  
> Here is a little chapter to make it up!
> 
> Thanks to [Sab](http://gondolinnel.com/) for the beta work even tho she's sick!

We sat across from each other at the kitchen table in silence, the kitten fast asleep in Levi’s arms.

We’d left the secret office in my parents’ bedroom, my father’s diary resting on the table between us.  
We still hadn’t spoken a word.  
I was speechless.  
Thoughts were spinning in my head, I could feel the beginning of a headache forming.

I kept thinking and thinking over what I’d learned, trying to make some sense of it all.

I was born with the ability to see colors.  
My father did, something to me to make me achromatic.  
He fucked me up so bad, even the touch of my soulmate couldn’t make me see colors.  
He did it because some people could get their hands on me and probably turn me into a rat lab.  
Mikasa’s father helped him.  
Mikasa’s father who died in a car accident along with his wife, leaving Mikasa with a scar on her neck that she always covered with her scarf.  
The scarf I gave her when we adopted her.  
And then she’d lost her second family, when a robbery had gone wrong and my mother died, leaving a smear of blood still visible on the living room floor.  
Then my dad’s disappearance, leaving me alone with Mikasa when we were only 12.

I felt like there was a connection, but I couldn’t quite grasp what it was, how these events were connected to one another.

_Fuck._

I thought I’d been angry at Levi, but that was nothing compared to how I felt about my father in at this very moment.  
He had left us, two kids, just after their mother had died.

I hated him.

Levi picked up the diary, re-reading the passage that had me throw it away.  
He turned some pages and I saw him raised his eyebrow then look at me.

“What?” I harshly asked

“It’s what gave you heterochromia”, he said.

It was my turn to raise my eyebrow.

“There”, he showed me a passage, “he said you had amber eyes, both of them, and then,” he flipped a few pages “after… after the experiment, he said that your left eye turned green. That’s how your eyes became like that”

I looked at the open page.

I really hated my father.

I raised my eyes, staring at Levi. He was staring back, studying me.

“We should get back”, he finally said, “It’s been two days now, I’m sure your friends must be worried.”

I rubbed my hands against my face.  
As if they’d notice.  
With Mikasa busy competiting and Armin busy with his internship, they probably hadn’t thought much of it.

Still, it was time to get back.

I got up from my chair and glanced down at Levi.

“What are you going to do about the kitten though?” I asked. It was still asleep in his arms, a tiny grey ball of fur sleeping soundly.

“I’ll keep it, I guess” he answered softly, gently petting the kitten.

“Alright”, I made my way toward the door, determined to get out of here.

“Eren wait,” I heard Levi call behind me. I turned around.  
“I’m sorry to ask, but, your father’s research, may I bring it? I’m sure Hanji would be excited, they’ve searched for it for so long, and it could help us understand the Revelation…”  
He didn’t finish his sentence, not sure of how I would react.

I didn’t care at this point, honestly.

“Take everything”, I said before finally getting out of this house.

 

The ride home was calm.

Levi had taken all my father’s research, and the kitten, and left in his own car.

He had agreed on meeting in two days in a small café, he said we had more talking to do.  
Which was true.

For my part, I was getting back to my apartment, tired and still angry.

I didn’t want to stay alone though, I needed to talk to someone.  
I couldn’t keep all that I’d learned to myself, and so I decided to call Armin and Mikasa, to tell them.

It had been some time since the three of us had spent time together, alone, and I needed to tell Mikasa what her dad had done, even if it would pain her.  
I couldn’t keep her in the dark.  
I also needed to tell them about Levi being my soulmate.  
I needed their advice and company now more than ever.

After a quick call, both of them told me they were on their way with the promise of food.

I was quite hungry, I’d eaten nothing but the quick breakfast with Levi this morning.

Both of them arrived 20 minutes later with pizza. _I love them._

Pizza was what I needed when I was down, they knew exactly what would cheer me up.

We all sat in the living room, Armin and I on the couch while Mikasa sat in the armchair.

“It’s been a long time since there were just the three of us” Armin said between two bites of pizza.  
Mikasa hummed to that, busy eating her slice.  
“So what have you guys been up to?”

“Nothing extraordinary, some competitions, university, same old thing”, Mikasa said. “What about you? How is the internship going?”

“It’s going great!” Armin said excitedly, “I’m learning so many things! It’s really interesting! Not only do I get to work with Dr. Zoë, but also with the top scientists at Recon Corp!”

“Mhm, I’m sure that 90% of that excitement comes from the fact that you can spend a lot of time with your mates” Mikasa teased.

Armin blushed, sputtering,  
“No, well, yes, a little, I’m still relatively new to this whole mate thing” he made hand gestures indicating how vague the whole “mate thing” was.  
“It’s fun and all you know, Mike and Erwin are really nice, I’m also starting to see colors more frequently, it’s amazing”, his cheek became darker and darker while he spoke, a shade of dark grey plastered in his cheeks.  
“Anyway, enough about me, we haven’t heard from you Eren in a while! What have you been up to? I heard that you been spending quite some time with Levi!”

I straightened up in my chair, ready to talk about the elephant in the room they weren’t aware of.

“Well, speaking of soulmates…”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> And yesss, Levi kept the kitten!  
> About that, I have a name in mind for the kitten but i'll be glad to hear how you guys would name it!!
> 
> Comments and feedback make my life, if you leave one you'll make my day! It can just say "u did gut", just so I know you guys liked it!
> 
> My tumblr is [levis-diddly-dong](http://levis-diddly-dong.tumblr.com/)!


	30. Merigold

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> New chapter yay!!  
> So finals are coming up next week and some times later too, so don't really expect a new chapter that soon (as if i update regularly hahaha...)
> 
> Also holy FUCK THIS FIC REACHED 700 LIKES????  
> Seriously thanks to all of you who still read this and comment and leave kudos, I would have probably stopped writing if it wasn't for you guys! Ily!
> 
> Thanks to [Sab](http://gondolinnel.tumblr.com/) for the beta work!

They both looked at me, mouth agape and the pizza long forgotten on the table.

 

I had finally told them that Levi was my soulmate.

 

It felt good to actually tell someone about what had happened the last two days. I felt a lot lighter, like I had gotten rid of a weight I didn’t know had settled on my chest.

 

Honestly I didn’t know what had surprised them the most.

The fact that Levi was my soulmate, or that I couldn’t see colors despite touching him.

 

I was sure Armin would enter his “scientist mode” sooner or later, and that Mikasa would be ready to kick Levi’s ass for lying to me, but I had other things to tell them too.

 

“That’s not all” I said, fidgeting under their stares in my seat.

 

“What? What more could you possibly have to say?” asked Mikasa. She was frowning a little, but I knew she wasn’t angry.

 

Not yet at least.

 

“Well, yesterday, I actually went back _home_ …” Their eyebrows rose in surprise. They both knew what “home” meant, I didn’t have to tell them that it was the home in which Mikasa and I had grown up.

They also knew that I hadn’t returned there after we left, Mikasa and I, since my mother’s death.

“I was pissed, you see, and drove all the way to the beach, and Levi found me there, and it was late at night so I figured we better go there than drive all the way back”, I purposely omitted the part about Berthold, Reiner and Annie.

I still had to sort my thoughts out about what they’d told me.

“So,” I continued, “We went back home, slept there, and in the morning we heard a noise coming from Mom’s and Dad’s room. So went we searched for it, it was actually a kitten, and along the way we discovered a secret room”

 

If I could have, I would’ve taken a picture of their reactions. It was amazing! Both their eyes were wide open ,as well as their mouths.

 

I cleared my throat a little,

“So, it was actually like Dad’s secret office or something, ‘cause we found all his research in it as well as his diaries”

 

I could see the curiosity in Armin’s eyes grow more and more. We all knew that my father was famous for his research on the Revelation. For his research to be found was great news.

“And in his diary,” I exhaled, preparing myself for this; it would be the first time that I would say it out loud. Levi had read the diary; I hadn’t had to actually tell him. I well, I had kind of ranted about it, but announcing it to someone who had no idea what my father did was another thing.

 

I didn’t know how to say it.

 

They both waited, more or less patiently for me to find my words.

 

I could feel a frown on my face. My jaw clenched and unclenched uncontrollably.

 

“Apparently, I could see the colors when I was little, and…”, once again I exhaled slowly trying to compose myself, “my dad, for whatever reason, thought it would be better for me to be like everyone else”

 

I could sense that Armin had already guessed what had happened, and as for Mikasa, well _now_ she was mad.

 

“So he performed some modification on my eyes so I could be achromatic like every one else. That’s what caused my heterochromia, and” I hesitantly looked at Mikasa, “your father helper him”

I had actually kept his diaries with me. Levi had taken all his research papers, and told me that I should keep the diaries.

 

They sat in a stunned silence for a while before Mikasa burst up growling “ _bastards_ ”.

 

It took a while to calm her down and have her sit, and convince her that what was done was done and that they probably had their own reason to do it.

I was saying this trying to convince her that it was fine now, but I knew deep down that I was actually trying to convince _myself_ that they hadn’t been complete assholes.

 

I knew from the diary that my dad had been running from someone. That he had been trying to protect me.

But had he thought of the repercussions?

 

Had he thought about the fact that his son would never be able to see the colors, even after finding his soulmate?

Had he thought that his friend would die in a car accident with his wife, which I now suspected wasn’t really an accident, leaving their only daughter alone?

Had he thought that his wife would die in a robbery, that I suspected too wasn’t a robbery?

Had he thought that he’d have to leave his kids to save them?

 

Or had he left to save himself?

 

I felt heavy again.

It was like I didn’t know this person at all, who I had called father my whole life.

 

I had so many questions and no one to answer them.

 

So much mystery, so many dark points and no one to help me put light on them all.

 

A black pit was spreading at my feet and I was drowning in it, my father bringing me closer and closer to the bottom.

I was neck deep into it, barely able to breathe at this point.

 

 

I was once again in calm of the living room.

 

 

Then Armin spoke.

 

“What about the kitten?”

 

We looked at him, dumbfounded.

 

Of all the things he could have said, he worried about the damn kitten.

 

And I laughed.

I couldn’t control myself, I didn’t know why I was just dying of laugher.

 

I could hear my own laugh ringing in my ears soon joined in by Armin and Mikasa.

I could feel my muscles working each time a cascade of laugh escaped my lips.

I could hear Armin’s high-pitched laugh and Mikasa’s almost silent one.

I could hear my short breath between bursts of laughter.

I could feel the heat on my face, warm and almost reassuring.

 

And I could feel the tears on my face.

 

 

But in this instant, laughing with the two people I cherished and loved more than anything, I knew I would be okay no matter what.

 

_I’ll be alright._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So, at first I kinda wanted to end the fic right here and there...  
> But you should all thanks Sab who told me I had too many plot hole to end this fanfic here...  
> So it's still going on!!
> 
> What do you guys think of this chapter? Do you think there is a chance for some nice ereri moment to happen?  
> I think an arc kinda ended here...
> 
> My tumblr is [levis-diddly-dong](http://levis-diddly-dong.tumblr.com/) come bug me anytime!!


	31. Emerald

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Quite sudden isn't it?
> 
> Thanks to [gondolinnel](http://gondolinnel.tumblr.com/) for the beta work!

Needless to say I was nervous as heck.

It had been one week since my little excursion to the beach and since life changing truth had been thrown in my face. 

Levi and I had agreed to meet at a little coffee shop, in front of which I was currently standing. 

Was it a date? Did it count as a date?  
Now we both knew that we were soulmates, but that something was wrong with me. 

Where would our relationship go from now?  
Would we go on as if nothing had happened? Would we be able to have a “normal” relationship after all these lies? With my fucked up eyes? 

Did I forgive him? 

The truth was, I did.  
Even though a part of me still wanted to be mad at him, I couldn’t stay mad for too long.  
I think my first reaction had already demonstrated how mad I was at the time, there were no doubt he had understood my reaction, and I on the other side understood why he had what he had.  
How would I react if my soulmate was 8 years younger than me and that he didn’t see the colors whenever we touched?  
Honestly I would be scared shitless. I would think that maybe something had gone wrong and that I’d be bound to have a soulmate that’s not really my soulmate. Like unrequired love, but worse. 

Either way, I wasn’t angry with Levi anymore. 

I was just nervous now.  
Of course I still had a massive crush on the guy. It wouldn’t go away just like that.  
Not that I wanted it to. 

Taking a deep breath I tried to calm my nerves. I had to go inside now or else I’d be late. And I knew that Levi hated late people. 

I entered the coffee shop and found Levi already sitting at a table near the corner of the shop. I made my way toward him feeling even more nervous. 

“Hey”, I sat across from him. “It’s a nice coffee shop, I’ve never been here”, words escaped my lips before I could think better of it.  
Nervousness did that to me, at least I hadn’t said anything embarrassing. Yet. 

“It’s a tea room, not a coffee shop”, he muttered.  
I raised an eyebrow, this guy really loved sophisticated things. 

We sat there in silence, looking at each other, no one daring to say a word. 

What could I possibly say? 

_“Hey, I know you lied to me, took advantage of me to do some test, all “in the name of science” and all, but truth is I still have a crush on you! What? You didn’t know I had a crush on you? Well damn, I thought I was kinda obvious. By the way I have no idea how our relationship would work out so I guess it’s kind of is a shitty situation with my eyes and my crazy father haha.”  
_

Right, as if that would go well. 

“How’s the kitten?” I blurted out instead.  
_Yes Eren, talk about the kitten, safe ground.  
_

“He’s fine”, Levi said, a little surprised. “I decided to keep him” 

“Oh, so it’s a boy?” I hadn’t had time to check it, I had been too busy exploring my dad’s secret office.  
Besides I don’t think it would have let me hold it. The little shit had bitten me last time.  
“Did you name it?” 

Levi looked embarrassed. Was that a little color on is cheek?  
I say color, but all I saw was that his cheeks darkened a little and were now a faint grey.  
“Yes, his name is Croque.” 

“Croque? Is it short for something?” 

Did his cheek just darken more again? 

“Humm, yeah, for Croquembouche”. 

I stared at him. 

“You named your cat after a _pastry_?” I snorted. Oh god, was this guy even real.  
He was definitely blushing now. 

“Well, yes, it’s my cat isn’t it? He’s sweet, so I decided it would suit him” 

I couldn’t help myself, I laughed. God, beneath all that sass Levi was really sweet.  
Exactly like how he liked his coffee. He would take it black, and then add tons of sugar and cream. 

“What would you name him anyway?” He asked after I calmed myself.  
I no longer felt nervous now; after all, it was only Levi. 

“Well, I’d give him an asshole name!” He raised his eyebrows, “Levi the cat bit me when I tried to take him” 

“Maybe you weren’t gentle enough” I was appalled. It wasn’t like I grabbed the kitten roughly; I’m pretty sure this kitten had a personal vendetta against me. 

“Sure, anyway, if it was up to me I’d call him… Hum let’s see, an asshole name” I rubbed the back of my head trying to come up with a name. 

A waitress appeared just then, asking us if we had decided what to order.  
I hadn’t looked at the menu since I sat down.  
I quickly scanned it trying to find something to order. 

“I’ll order for you” Levi said, probably after seeing me panic over the menu. 

He turned to the waitress,  
“I’ll take a baklawa, an apple and rhubarb crumble and a black coffee, and for him the mint and vervain infusion and…” he quickly scanned the menu.  
I was surprised he remembered my favorite infusion.  
“And a mille-feuilles”  
I didn’t know what a mille-feuilles was but I trusted him enough to hope he wouldn’t order something I didn’t like. 

“Alright, I’ll be right back” And with that she left. 

“Have you ever been here before?” I asked, he seemed familiar with the menu enough that I guessed he had. 

“Yeah quite often, they have some really good pastries” 

I chuckled, “You really have a sweet tooth” 

“Sugar is good,” was his only response.

  

“I wonder though”, I said after waitress had returned with our orders.  
The mille-feuilles turned out to be a rectangular pastry with puff pastry superposed with pastry cream and a vanilla icing.  
Very tasty.  
“What’s the point of ordering black coffee if you’re just going to put so much cream and sugar in it?”  
True to himself, as soon as he got his coffee Levi started to add sugar (4 cubes) and cream. 

“Because black coffee is too bitter alone”, he said taking a bite of his crumble. 

“Yeah but you could order an already sweet coffee, like, I don’t know, a caffè macchiatto or a café au lait or something”.  
I took a sip of my infusion.  
Damn this was good.  
I would have to return here sometime.  
Maybe Levi would agree to come back with me? 

“I don’t have any valid reason honestly. That’s just how I do it” 

I shook my head. 

We continued to eat in silence.  
It wasn’t a tense or awkward silence. We were just enjoying each other’s presence. At least, _I_ was enjoying Levi’s presence.  
It was kind of like those lunches I’d spent at his office when working at Recon Corp. 

“Stanley” I blurted out after a while. 

“What?” asked Levi.

“The kitten’s name. Stanley, don’t you think it would fit him? Stanley is kind of an asshole name in my opinion.” 

Levi looked at me, baffled. He closed his eyes and shook his head. 

“Sure, why not, let’s name the damn cat Stanley Croquembouche, it’s not that bad”. 

I beamed at him. 

It was a good name indeed.

 

 

 

 

Levi and I met several more times at the tea room.  
We still didn’t call our meetups dates, but who were we fooling?

They totally were dates. 

We still saw each other at work and ate lunch together.  
I had to say, now I understood why Armin spent so much time with Erwin and Mike. 

Spending time with Levi was amazing; we could talk for hours, or just sit here in silence and be content.  
We would bicker, tease each other and laugh together.  
It was just amazing being with him. 

He had apologized once more for his lies, and we sat down for a while trying to sort out our relationship and see where we would head from now. 

Hanji had also apologized, wrapping me in a bear hug and almost crushing me, saying over and over how they were sorry but they did all for science.  
Honestly I was a little scared of how far they were willing to go “for science”.  
Moblit apologized too, though more calmly than his soulmate.

Hanji was still trying to figure out what was wrong with my eyes, but with my father’s diaries and research they were confident that they could fix what had been done to me.  
I hoped they were right. 

Now that Armin was out of his honeymoon phase with Mike and Erwin he spent more time with Mikasa and I.  
It was good seeing them both again, even if Mikasa was out of the town from time to time for her competitions. 

We still didn’t know who exactly my father was running from and from who he had tried to protect me. He was definitely MIA and I didn’t know if I ever wanted to find him.  
Maybe one day we’d figure out what it that was all really about.  
Erwin did his best to find these people, I for one didn’t think he would succeed, but who knew?

  

 

 

I was currently sitting on Levi’s couch, huddled against him and watching a movie. Croque was lying on Levi’s laps, purring softly.  
The cat had grown a lot since Levi had taken him in and had now almost reached his full adult size.  
I had insisted that Levi and I spent as much time together, touching a lot so that he would be able to see colors even without touching me, though it was honestly just an excuse to spend as much time as I could with him.  
I don’t think he minded.  
He was finally starting to see them without me but only for short amounts of time. 

“I don’t get it” Levi said for the umpteenth time.  
We were watching Inception, and to say Levi didn’t get it was an understatement. 

“Maybe if you paid more attention instead of petting Stanley you would” 

“I wouldn’t get it even if I tired Eren, I thought they were in a dream, and what’s with Leo and his whirligig?”  
I sighed. 

“Forget it Levi, you wouldn’t get it. I guess this is too complicated for you, maybe we should switch to something less challenging?” I teased him. 

“Shut your mouth” he grumbled, bending a little to kiss me, thus shutting me up effectively. 

I kissed him back, feeling electricity travel through my body.  
Each time we kissed it was the same thing.  
My heart would accelerate sometimes to the point where I’d worry I’d die of a stroke, my head would feel light, mind filled with his smell, how his body felt against mine. 

He backed away a little, just a mere inch.  
I looked into his grey eyes, a warm feeling blooming into my chest, almost suffocating me. 

“You’re beautiful”, he whispered against my lips. 

I felt my face heat up. 

“You shut up” I mumbled back and kissed him again. 

I moved my lips against his soft ones, tasting him. 

I loved this.  
I loved being with him, I loved laughing with him, I loved cooking with him, I loved seeing him work, I loved his smile, his laugh, his eyes, his hair.  
I loved everything about him. 

I drew back a little. 

One of my hands came to rest against his cheek, caressing the soft skin. 

“I love you”. I said softly. **  
**

I distinctly saw his already dilated pupils grow, his eyes now almost black, only a lining of silver on the edge of his iris. 

He smiled fondly. 

“I love you too”, he whispered. 

And we kissed again, soft and sweet, everything that I ever wanted.

  

I felt a rush go trough me, warm spreading all over me, leaving trail of fire on my body.  
It was as though I was finally complete, comfort and alleviation setting into my body. 

I didn’t care that I couldn’t see the color, as long as I was with Levi. I could see the world with him, experiencing it by his side and that was all that mattered to me.  
I could turn blind for all I cared, I could live trough him and it wouldn’t change the fact that I loved him more than anything else.  
Each day brought new adventures with him, I could see the world as I’d never seen it before I met him.  
It was like everything was brighter now, sharper. Like I had lived in a dull, underwater dimension before.  
Everything was still grey but for me it was enough and even more, it was like I was living for the first time, seeing the hidden beauty in our world. 

I opened my eyes, and looked at my soulmate.

  
So this was what it was like.  
To See.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> "Whaaat? It's already finished?"
> 
>  **Finally** finished you mean!
> 
> So yes, it was the last chapter of To See.
> 
> So here is a little note about this work.
> 
> Damn, I started this the in September 2014 can you believe it? It's been 1 year and a half!  
> At first I thought that I'd finish this in like, 20 chapter, but here we hare, 30 chapter and it's finally the end.  
> I have to say at time I didn't think I would ever finish this, I can't count the number of time I gave up on this fic and writing altogether.  
> It all started thank to this prompt on tumblr (link to said prompt on the first chapter) and it was my first real multichaptered fanfic that i was serious about. I would have never guessed that I would get 700+ kudos and 15000+ hits. 
> 
> So it's kinda like my first ever fanfiction that I wrote, and honeslty i'm glad this is over.  
> I'm so relieved, this fic really stressed my at times, because I know that I hate when auther don't update fanfiction and I hated doing that to you guys. But well author have reason and mine was severe lack of motivation regarding everything that had to do with this fic.
> 
> So thank you everyone that has been following me since the beginning, thanks to all of you who left comments and kudos I really couldn't have finished without you guys.
> 
> Thank you also to all three beta I had trough this fic, first Novac then a little with Savy and then Sab, this fic would definitely bee way more shitty without you guys.  
> Thanks Sab especially, I don't think I would have finished this without you (it seems you're good at making me finish fic).
> 
> I'm sorry if there are some plot hole and if the end seems a little rushed, it's actually not the end as I more or less had more plan for this fic, but I don't think I'll ever have the courage to continue it. I think the end it good as it is right now, I don't think i could do more or better.  
> If you have any question regarding a plot hole or anything just leave a comment I always reply to them!
> 
> I wrote other thing if you guys are interested in them, feel free to check them out!
> 
> My tumblr is [levis-diddly-dong](http://levis-diddly-dong.tumblr.com/) if you want to ask anything!
> 
> P.S: Sorry to all the Stanley reading this. It was either this or Stanford...


End file.
